There are times when we feel like we have reached the rock bottom in our lives, we feel burnt out and exhausted. Everything we tried our hands on just doesn't seem to work out. Everything appears to be a chaos! In times like these we try to find things and people to blame for all the thing going wrong, and most times, we are the easy target.
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It quite easy for us criticize, blame and torture ourselves with negative thoughts when the decisions we believe will give positive results end up giving the opposite, when everything seems to go wrong, etc. But when we act in such a manner towards ourselves, we only keep ourselves from growing and being better.
Most times, it really isn't your fault that things turned out the way they did, that you've reached your own limits. But well, even if it's not our fault, we get too hard on ourselves which only end up hurting us.
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Maybe it really is all your fault, maybe you could have done better, but well, the deed has already been done, and torturing yourself isn't gonna change things, it's not gonna make you grow. It will only make you feel less, hurt your self-esteem and confidence level. It really isn't a practice worth indulging in.
If we really want to grow and recover from what we failed at, then we will need to stop beating ourselves. Being too hard on yourself is an ineffective approach towards recovering from setbacks. It will only live you feeling horrible and bitter
Here Is How You Can Help Yourself Out When You Are Faced With That
Stop The Negative Self-Talk
Crazy and negative thoughts will always wander in our mind especially in moments like this, and we will need to stop that. The act of beating yourself up is negative in itself, and obviously, negative thoughts brought about that. Stop the negative chatter and focus on the positive instead.
Motivate Yourself Instead
Yes, there is an alternative to beating yourself up, and that is motivating yourself. Motivation comes with love, and will help you see the possibilities that surround you, and also gives you the push you need to take a step forward. When all we do is blame and torture ourselves, we lose the motivation we need to walk through life, and that closes our eyes from seeing the beauty of life. See the possibilities, see the bigger picture.
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Appreciate The Other Things Which You Have Done
You have probably done a whole lot of thing which worked out fine, don't let a step you took which didn't work out well make you see yourself as a failure. As they say, you only fail when you stop trying. So, appreciate those things that worked out fine and let them inspire you to do better.
Practice Self Love
Self-love is what will take you far, it is easier for one to harbour gruelling thought and view about themselves, torture themselves when they don't understand their own self-worth and value. So, understand your worth, love your self and keep the torture away, it's not needed.
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Beating ourselves don't make things work out, it doesn't make things better and it definitely doesn't make you better. All it does is fuel your anguish and pains, we become the author of our own pains when we do that we only slow down our recovery process and in fact make things worse.
We don't always make the best of decisions and choosing to be too hard on yourself will probably be the worst decision you will ever make. No real fruit comes out of it, forgive yourself, learn and move on!
Much Love, Audrey
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