Marriage
Marriage is of God, it's an amazing institution when wisdom sits in that institution.
Image source: google
But i would love to address major causes of broken or failed marriages.
Marriages have been broken, divorces are happening because of two main reasons;
√ Communication
√ Money
These two reasons create conflict, and because people are not skillful in managing conflicts, relationships break.
It is important to note that every divorce started in a season of bliss.
How to handle conflict
You have to know that nobody is perfect. In fact planet earth cannot contain perfection.
So you have to know that someone is going to offend you.
If you can still disagree with your parents and siblings after so many years of living together, then why would you not expect some disagreements between your spouse.
offence is sure
Husbands rule your house with three things;
√ Whatever your wife wants, do it.
√ Whatever your wife wants, do it.
√ If 1 and 2 fails, always remind yourself that whatever your wife wants do it.
But this is the balance; do it as long as it's not destiny sensitive.
Make your NO rare
Rarity is the essence of value.
Gold is not expensive because it's shining, it is expensive because it's rare.
When your YES is more frequent than your NO, your NO becomes more valuable when it comes.
Whatever your wife wants, once you can afford it, say YES. If you can't say NO with dignity.
How to say NO
I would love to give a scenario of a husband and wife conversing;
Imae source: google
Wife: Honey, I want to buy this shoe, it's #20,000, can you just give me the money, there is this party I want to go to.
(Husband does not have the money, or you have but you don't want her to get the shoe.)
Husband: Come my darling, sit down. When do you want it.
Wife: I want it by....
Husband: What kind of shoe is it
Wife: Ahh!!! Come and see it
Husband: Wow!!! This is a very powerful shoe. I can imagine this shoe in your legs. Honestly, all my heart wants to get this for you. Unfortunately I can't afford it now. But let's put it in perspective, who knows? But what will you do now?
I don't think there is any woman that you will do that to and will think you are stupid.
So how to say no;
√ Begin by affirming what she wants.
√ Say NO.
√ Then offer support.
In the time of offence, let it go. Take your peace.
People have fought for their right so much that they have no peace.
The more you fight for your justice, you trade your peace for it.
Every time you win, you lose.
Wives don't fight for your place
You can't be arguing with your husband, and think you will get his best attention.
You weaken his authority when you do that.
You are free to reason with authority, not argue with authority
Learn to own up to your mistake
Now concerning divorce, I would like to say this;
When you divorce or separate, you take care of your pain, she takes care of her pain, you begin the pain of the children.
Once you have a child, I believe you have lost your right to divorce. Except your life or sanity is threatened.
The issue of money
When you want to marry somebody, you should explain your economic status.
Both husband and wife can make the money, it does not matter.
Your money and my money is our money.
God does not supply two people in marriage
The Bible says "two shall become one flesh".
That flesh is important; it means to God, the both of you is one personality.
When God looks at a couple, He sees one person not two people. So God gives one person blessings. It can come through him or her, but its our money.
Thanks so much for reading my post
Watch out for the final episode as i would be talking about PARENTING.
