Before you read this, please do something for yourself and make a small list of things that make you happy. After you finish reading, take a look at the list again and feel free to discuss them with me.
- Which ones truly belong to you?
- Which ones are the things you believe that should make you happy?
- What does unhappiness mean to you?
- How good are you when it comes to handling unhappiness?
I definetely believe that happiness mean a lot in our daily lives. Even the advertisements make a promise of happiness. We are surrounded by the lists of "secrets to happy life". It sounds like being a happy person is a task that we need to fulfill. In his book Being Unhappy: An encouragement, Wilhelm Schmid says that in todays society, we are convinced that we must be happy all the time, if not, life is not worth living.
I have so many moments, phases of my live that I can relate to this. I was, and still am making myself unhappy because I could not succeed to be happy. As if I was trying to fill the void of meaning in my life by trying to be happy, like a mission. I was escaping the influence of external situations.
In the book, sometimes author refers to happiness as an evil who asks even in our happy moments "Will this always make you happy? Will happiness always make you happy?" The more we convince ourselves that we need to be good and happy all the time, other side of the scale starts to outweigh, and we become unhappy again.
Because happiness is the way of being unhappy to seek happiness.
Instead, we can try to learn to live with unhappiness. I see the idea of acceptance as a magic wand here. As long as I work on it, and achieve it more or less, I become a different person with better choices in life. I belive that true authentic happiness comes with contrubution and meaning in our lives instead of trying to fulfill the duty of "being a happy person".
It's such a complicated and fluid subject to me. I often consider my ideas and feelings like a leaf in the wind. What do you think about it? Have you considered before that trying to be happy can make you unhappy? Do you think melancholy is bad or more like a thing that "comes with the package" ?
I'd like to hear your ideas on this whether it's similar or not. Hope to talk to you soon!