Thanks for your honest post. I definitely know where you are coming from. You need to be 100% in because of how much dedication it takes. A lot of the experienced practitioners at my gym travel around all day rolling; they live and breath jiu-jitsu. I am not sure I could keep up with it even if I was retired.

I am currently 3 months in, and constantly doubt myself, especially being also spread thin with work, family, and other interests. It has been the most humbling experience for me to date. Walking into a room with highly skilled fighters and coming in knowing nothing, learning something new each day and being the least experienced in the room, failing hard each time I go.

I told myself I would give it a year. I feel way in over my head, and have trouble staying motivated to go sometimes. But something inside keeps me going. We will see how it works out. It's a great community full of interesting and inspiring people and I feel great to be part of it despite how complex and challenging it is. In such a short time, it's really changed the way I act, move, and think, but still not sure yet whether it's all for the better.