Many people have mixed experiences with Valentines day. Maybe you feel pressure to continually one up your own romantic efforts each year. Maybe you perennially forget about it to the frustration of your spouse or significant other (guilty). You might associate it with unwanted attention or oppressive loneliness. Whatever the case, you probably don’t know who Valentine was in the first place, or what he had to do with romance. Never fear. As always, I’m here to give you the obscure backstory that you never knew you wanted to hear.
Valentine was a third century Roman priest in the time of Claudius—an emperor who was hostile to Christianity. At the time, it was thought that married men were less courageous in battle because they were concerned about what might happen to their families if they died. Therefore, while encouraging amorous relationships, the emperor prohibited marriage among those of military age. Despite this, Valentine chose to secretly marry couples in his church in defiance of the edict. For this reason, he was arrested and imprisoned.
While in prison, he is believed to have healed the daughter of one of his judges from blindness. Following this miracle, the judge and his family became Christians. Never the less, Valentine was sentenced to execution. He was beaten with clubs, stoned, and beheaded (in that order) on February 14, 269. On the morning of his execution, however, he is said to have written a letter to the judge’s young daughter. He closed the letter with the phrase “from your Valentine.” That’s right. That’s the phrase you remember from those awkward colourful cards you get from your mom every year.
It is ironic that, despite Valentine’s tenacious courage and willingness to sacrifice his life for what he believed, all that is remembered of him is associated with the most frivolous and shallow holiday on the calendar. However, true romance should certainly be associated with self-sacrifice. There comes a time in every relationship when one must suffer—choosing to fulfill one’s commitments despite the difficulty. So, regardless of your negative associations with Valentines day, view it as a time to remember the inseparable link between true romance and self-sacrifice.