Not sure if this applies to you? I didn't realize that I had previously been an enabler until looking more into Al Anon.
Has your life been affected?
#1 Do you worry about how much someone drinks?
#2 Do you have money problems because of someone else's drinking?
#3 Do you tell lies to cover for them?
#4 Do you feel like if that person loved you, they would stop to please you?
#5 Do you blame their drinking on his/her friends?
#6 Are plans changed or meals delayed because of their drinking?
#7 Do you make threats like "If you don't stop drinking, I will leave you?"
#8 Do you secretly smell the drinkers breath?
#9 Do you fear upsetting them in concern of setting off a drinking bout?
#10 Have you been hurt or embarrassed of their drinking behavior?
#11 Are holidays and events effected by their drinking?
#12 Have you considered calling the police in fear?
#13 Do you search for hidden alcohol?
#14 Have you refused invitations because of fear or anxiety?
#15 Do you feel like a failure because you cant stop their drinking?
#16 Do you feel like if the drinker stopped drinking, other problems would be solved?
#17 Do you threaten to hurt yourself to scare the drinker?
#18 Do you ever ride in the car with someone was has been drinking?
#19 Do you feel angry, confused or depressed most of the time?
#20 Do you feel like no one understands your situation?
If you answered one or more yes, than there is help for you. Don't be afraid to reach out for help and support. You'd be surprised how many people are struggling with this same issue. Most cities have Al Anon support groups and they are completely free. Don't feel alone!!! There is help!!!
The contents of this post were taken from Al Anon Family resources.