I was actually very nervous and worried before leaving. I was very lucky to have parents that understood me well enough about why I left to do this on my own and supported me emotionally. Along the way, realizing that maybe I was doing it to escape from society; there were times I felt like a coward in this aspect.

So I think before the trip, my preconception about leaving behind was exciting in my imagination and in my head. But when reality hits, the more I realized how much I don't know.

Maybe you do have the courage but just too realistic? ( kind of the opposite of how I was)