Are you feeling invalidated despite all the work, effort, and good intentions you put out there? Is your 100% not enough for them? Do you feel like you're breaking your back and being extra clingy just to be told off and cursed at?
If you do, that sucks but the only good side is that you're not alone. I also feel that a little more often
I have always thought that I'm doing a fine job existing and doing my daily roles only to end up feeling trash because someone said that what I'm doing and showing are not enough.
I was told that I don't appreciate someone enough and that I don't have the right to care about national issues because surprise surprise, the gratitude I'm showing is not enough even though I pour my 100% out.
This is not to raise sympathy or validation. I write to express and not to impress. I don't need someone to be on my side much more someone who will argue with me to make a point. I just want to let it out.
I just want to voice out that it's not okay being left, cursed at or insulted at just because I can't appreciate enough or so they say.
No matter how much love and appreciation I put out there, if these are not being recognized, even if I put a million times more, it will still be not enough. There are people who will always make you feel down and what's not surprising is that they are the ones you treasure the most.
I'm hurting physically because I'm sick but it's more painful emotionally and psychologically to take it all in.
I hope that sleeping can temporarily mend this hurt and anger. I hope.