I'm a bit late to catching up on your posts, probably because I've overloaded my feed a bit and missed 'em when they were originally posted.

But anyway, if you want to improve your motivation I've made a rambling post on it myself, that I realize now you shouldn't read because it's a bit wank, instead please read the most valuable titbit from it:

https://sloanreview.mit.edu/article/need-motivation-at-work-try-giving-advice/

I've been struggling with a bit of depression myself, but I've a plan to solve it! ;)

Hope to read more from you soon (well the next post actually, I haven't caught up yet..), and good luck!