It's so sad and heartbreaking.. I understand how you feel though . Most times we just wish death is just a word and has nothing on beings but at sane time we need to live up to it. Growing up as a child was not an easy one for me because I had always taught I would be the next to die . The stories I grew up to listen to was always how I lost my siblings uncles and aunts to the death which has been tagged a part of life.
I lost 6 of my siblings to while growing up. But one thing that has always kept me is the faith to rise for another day and a grandma to always remind me of how old I can grow before dying .this picture is a photo of her I took when I last went to the village to see her. She still looks happy and young .she said granddaughter can you you please get me a flat shoe? My legs can't carry my heels anymore! And I reply her granny don't worry I really don't have the money for flats but I can get you some big bread and delicious meals so you can have the strength to carry on while I go fend for the flats. She gives me strength and I love her with no fear of death. Take heart bro