“When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it
define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”
Life is uncertain. It’s as uncertain as things can get. There are times when you feel like you’re on cloud 9 and there are times when you want to sit in a corner and cry. When times are bad, often you want to give up. But let me tell you that giving up doesn’t solve anything for anyone. Not for you and certainly not for your family and friends.
A wise man once said, “If it is night, can dawn be too far away?” I love this quote because it gives you hope. And hope is the strongest emotion we’ve got. When you fall down, you don’t stay down. You get up, brush it off and move on. And I am here to tell you just how to do that.
When you do decide to try things again, you need to bring about a lot of changes in your life. If things didn’t work out in the past, you should make sure that you start doing them differently now. Failure is only an opportunity to reinvent yourself. But it’s a process that will take time. It might take some tough decisions on your part.
You are not just polishing yourself, you are carving out an entire new one. So let’s look at how it can be done.
1.Create A Vision For Your Future
I can’t stress how important this part is. This is the start of your new journey, your new life. When you are finally ready to make changes in your life and to be all that you can be, the first thing you need to do is to create a vision for your future, and make it as detailed as possible.
You need to decide what you want to be, who you want to be it with. Know in your heart what it is exactly that you want to achieve in your life. Imagine the type of people you want to be around, the house you want to live in, the car you want to drive and the partner you want to date.
Of course for this, you need to assess your passion and your strengths. You need to do what you love to do and gauge where your strengths lie. If these two match, you are well on your way, on the road to reinventing yourself.
Let’s say, you failed as an entrepreneur but always had a passion for writing and were always good at it, then you need to decide in your heart that you will be a great writer and add it to your vision of who you want to be and make it your life’s mission from that day onwards that you will do anything and everything in your power to achieve this vision.
2.Plan Your Way To Your Vision
Having a finish line only, is not enough. You need a path to your finish line, your vision. A path where you can not only walk but run if the opportunity presents itself. This means that you need to sit down and lay out just how it is you will reach your goals. Discern your strengths and weaknesses and devise ways so as to use your strengths to the maximum while minimising the effects of your weaknesses.
Give yourself a fixed amount of time to realise your goals. That way it will be set in stone. It won’t be vague anymore. Consult your family, friends and even experts if need be and use all the support you can get. It is very important that your plans are flexible and dynamic because things are always changing in the world and you better be ready to improvise!
3.Let Go of Things
On the road to reinvention, there is only so much you can take with you. In order to move forward, you need to let go of some baggage. Be it people, things, places, situations, you need to get rid of everything that is holding you back. Only then can you be propelled forward freely.
This is called tidying up. It signals your brain that you are doing something, you are making a change, and you are in control. It motivates you and fills you with energy to do the necessary. It justifies your plans and your motives. It might get ugly getting rid of things/people, but stick to it. Tell yourself that it is for the greater good.
Having done this, you will feel lighter and you will notice your energy change for the better. You will be more focused towards your goals and the road ahead with nothing holding you back anymore.
4.Address Your Flaws
Looking forward is very important but sometimes, looking back for the sake of self improvement can be even more important. Everyone has flaws. Nobody is perfect. But we owe it to ourselves to improve every day, to become better versions of ourselves.
Look back at the reason for your failures. Which flaws were responsible for them? Once you realise them, you better start addressing them. It will help increase your self confidence, make you a better person, and decrease the chances of those flaws ever coming between you and your goals.
Sometimes you don’t have to look back to see your flaws. Ask your friends and family straight up. Usually they won’t tell you, fearing they might hurt your feelings. But if you tell them that you truly want to improve and be a better you, they will not only list out your flaws but will be ready to see you through them. There will be an atmosphere of constructive criticism. But you need to be willing to help yourself. Nobody helps a person who is not willing to help himself.
5.Expand Your Social Circle
You might find, after you let some people go in step 3, that your social circle has shrunk. If so, you need to get to work and start making new friends. The best practise would be to surround yourself with like minded people who share your vision and goals. You could learn from each others’ successes and mistakes.
Also, these connections could go a long way in helping you achieve your goals. You never know who might come to your help and at what point of your life and if that could be the turning point for your life. I have read about a lot of people who achieved massive success just because they started networking with the right people at the right time.
6.Stay Motivated
Even after you do everything in your power to set you off on a new path, you might not start to see results immediately. You might not see results for some time even. But, you got to stay motivated and keep walking down the chosen road.
There will be obstacles along the path but know that, they will only make you stronger. There will be sharp curves but know that, they will only make you wiser. Be brave. Be patient.
There will be days where you will question this new path you have chosen and would want to quit. But let me tell you right now. Resilience is your companion on your journey to uncharted territories. Never let it go. Find what motivates you most and remind yourself, why exactly you are doing this.
7.Be More Grateful
This one is something I have tried out personally and something that has worked out well for me till now. This relates to the law of attraction which says that the more grateful you are for the things you have, the more of those things you will keep getting in your life. So, while reinventing yourself, just be grateful for things you want to keep seeing in your life. Do this daily and have faith that you will get to your goal.
Now, a lot of people may not believe in this. For them, I say that, being grateful has no negative impacts. Even if you don’t believe in the law of attraction, being grateful goes a long way in character building and inculcating humility in oneself, both of which are very important for self-improvement.