(Image by sayjinlink on DeviantArt)
I've had an affinity towards animals ever since I can remember. I felt such a strong empathic connection with them at a young age, especially when I was raised in an Asian culture that disregarded their lives primarily as food or utility. Dogs would be kept on chains to guard houses and be deprived of attention. I witnessed a pig slaughter and its cries still stuck with me well into my adulthood. I cried when my teacher smashed these beautiful caterpillars with her heels on the playground. This is how I knew I was different from everyone around me. Growing up, animals were my favorite topic to read about. I had a chicken, a turtle, a bunch of guinea pigs, lizards, frogs, rats, hamsters, rabbits, cats, and dogs. All of this made sense when I found myself on a shamanic path in my spiritual journey.
When I was 22, I had an inexplicable urge to get a black jaguar tattooed down my back. I haven't cared much about tattoos before, but I imagined this huge, bold, and black tattoo. I never got it.
Years later, I made an appointment with an exorcist in LA who was also a TV horror show writer. She has a special gift where she can see astral creatures that fed on a person's addictions, distortions, etc. She mentioned that often times when a homeless person is yelling at thin air, she would actually see something there. As she shook her rattle and circled around me, she called on my guides--one of them sure enough, was the black jaguar. "The black jaguar is a transmuter of dense energies. He's here to help you," she said.
I had forgotten about the black jaguar for a while, until I met another shaman who offered to initiate me and activate my shamanic template. We sat across each other and closed our eyes. Immediately, I saw a purple spiral in my mind's eye and a big cat that was made of golden light swiftly ran through the spiral and took over the darkness of my inner vision. I opened my eyes and before I could say anything, the shaman said, "I felt one of your spirit guides come in." This is when I knew the black jaguar was here to stay.
Another time I encountered the black jaguar was when I had listed my space on AirBnb. I never met the guy who stayed at my house before, but that night he texted me, "I was trying to sleep when I felt a presence put their hands on my ears. But I wasn't scared because it just let me know it was there." I was at my cousin's house at the time who also happens to have a spiritual gift of seeing. I told her to tune into my house because there was an entity there bothering my guest. The first thing she told me was, "I don't know why, but I see this beautiful black jaguar with diamond green eyes pacing around the room." So I texted my guest back and joked, "Maybe it's my black jaguar." A few minutes passed when he replied again, "When I read that, tears flooded my eyes and my body started vibrating. Because now that I think about it, it was strong, powerful, and black like the night." I apologized, and tuned into my black jaguar and told it to guard the space, but not bother whoever I gave permission to stay there.
(Image from Pinterest)
I define spirit animals as our guides in the unseen world. They represent the archetypes that are reflective of our own strengths and shadows. Spirit animals often will show up in our reality as an animal we are most drawn to at the moment. Usually, they appear at opportune times during your life when you need to hear their messages the most. Your spirit animals speak through symbols and synchronicities and all you have to do is listen.
Some Tips on How to Connect Your Spirit Animals
Be aware which animals you gravitate to or notice more often than usual. It is your subconscious telling you something needs your attention.
Once you think you are being guided by a spirit animal, you can meditate on them to see if any messages come up for you because they appear in your life to help guide you in your situation.
Sometimes reading about animal totems online can help translate messages when a sentence just jumps out and resonates with you.
Ask them to show you signs. If you need help with a particular issue, ask them to help you with it and only you will know the sign when it appears.
Know that you are already connected to them and you can communicate with them through your heart center. Even if your psychic faculties are not active, they are listening.
I had since moved out of that house, so my black jaguar follows me around now. I know this because sometimes an energetically sensitive person walks into the room I'm staying at and will notice the presence of a "friendly guardian."
So aside from protecting me, what else did I learn from the black jaguar?
According to Shamanic Journey:
The Jaguar’s medicine includes seeing the roads within chaos and understanding the patterns of chaos, moving without fear in the darkness, moving in unknown places, shape shifting, psychic vision, facilitating soul work, empowering oneself, reclaiming power. The Black Jaguar’s medicine includes the same as jaguar but in addition keeper of the circular time continuum, gatekeeper to the unknown. And they draw their power from the lunar moon.
Learning about the symbolic traits of the black jaguar is extremely powerful in affirming my self-discovery. I've always been particularly good at seeing patterns in this reality matrix. Overcoming a childhood fear of the dark was also monumental in discovering my strength. None of my pictures can portray what I really look like because I seem to shape shift. I can jump into many modalities and fit in any kind of crowd quite easily. Psychic vision seems very natural to me. I was also born into a body that was scrawny and petite, and I had no choice but to make up for my size by reclaiming my power and empowering myself. The most important aspect of all is facilitating soul work because that is the main medicine I work with in my service to others. And the name I have chosen for myself means "moon goddess," as a way to draw power from the moon. It seems that the more I've come to know myself on this journey, the more I recognize that I am the black jaguar.
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