Dudes, it won't be easy..
I call upon fellow dads and dads-on-deck (expecting) to think about the path 'less traveled'. It's not an easy path, by any stretch, but it has its rewards. You can be a Stay-At-Home Dad for your kids even if you're shaking your head at the screen, with an audible "Nope!". Hear me out.
I never imagined..
I never thought that I could be a stay-at-home dad, but now I've been doing it for nearly 4 years. I have two children, ages two & three & a half. Is it challenging? It's the hardest job I've ever had in my life! And the the worst pay, yes. Worth it? Yes, every second. Sometimes it takes some intense effort; other times it's completely effortless. We are naturally born for this; creating, nurturing, and sustaining life.
You will learn to extend your boundary of limitation..
Full-time parenting will teach you many things about yourself and it's a wonderful process. Babies know how to break an adult down into fragments and rebuild you. They can make a grown man cry and I'm not talking necessarily 'tears of joy' all of the time. That little bundle of joy controls your entire world. At times it can get stressful and very overwhelming. But to me, occasional stress and overwhelming sounds like every single job I've ever had - ever. Think about it.
How you can work and make it work..
Though it is difficult to allocate time to work when you've got a child (or more) to care for, it isn't impossible. I think it is the best way for a man to increase their workflow and hone time management skills. It's like Mission Impossible. It takes some time and patience to get used to the 'environment', but it gets easier with practice. It is also easier when you realize that sometimes you just need to make a sacrifice, most often that means giving up some precious time. You're a parent, so whether you stay home or go to work - you're going to relinquish your time to someone.
Time escapes one way or another..
Time is the greatest gift a person can give. Why not invest that time in your little ones? You'll also find that sacrifice is just part of the deal, but there will be so much more fulfillment in your life. Being the consistent anchor in your child's life is more rewarding than a high-paying career that limits your time with them. And who says you can't have both at the same time? This mission is possible fellas.
Parenting is Give/Take: YOU give and the KIDS take..
If you're like me, you don't shy away from a challenge. One must be entirely invested to truly provide for a child. There is no exceptions to this because they deserve 100% every day. Oh, the job has no sick days or leave time - just suck it up, Dad. In the process you will gain many skills and learn ways to entertain yourself like you can't possibly imagine now. You'll soon find your ability to give more than you ever knew you had within you. This is your natural ability.
You will learn to be creative, manage your time quite efficiently and you'll be carrying that value over to your clients or customers one day. Again, this is paying exponentially in the long run - your investing in your future and the future of your family. Your kids will grow up seeing all of this effort, multitasking, tremendous dedication, hard work, failures, successes, achievements, and they will appreciate it (eventually). They take in the world around them all day, whether we think so or not. They're little sponges that absorb their environment. It's up to us to provide and instill values that will shape them as adults one day. When children have happy, fun, motivated parents that love them - they will greatly thrive!
Take the leap..
I created the infographic above (2015) and I stand behind it today. I'm sharing it in the event that my case here isn't convincing you to take the #DaddyDaycare #leapOfFaith for your kids, for yourself, and to have some of the most fun you've ever had (while working your ass off!).
Monkey see, monkey do..
Don't let them see you droning on at a computer all day or sifting through your phone like a zombie; you need to be active and constantly creating new ways to keep learning fun. I love to learn and share what I learn with my kids. Since my first child was born, I've tried to find ways to make learning more fun and natural. Looking back at the past three & a half years, I'd say that it has been incredibly beneficial.
Learning is a life long journey..
The love for learning is a gift that lasts a lifetime. Watching a child appreciate and truly advance through life with that gift you've passed on is the most fulfilling reward. It has to be up there with 'selling a company for $2 billion' kind of feelings.
Final Thoughts (but I'm not Jerry Springer)..
Daddy Daycare is one incredible experience and after a few years of it, I can see how fast it flies by. We've got to enjoy it as much as we can. Kids are fun, hilarious, and I think that giving them our time as a father, in their early years, is not just important - it is crucial. They'll thank you later on, you'll thank yourself when you see how truly rewarding it is. That is a win:win for everyone - society included!
From one Full-Time-Dad to any potential candidate with the decision to make: Do it. Believe you can do it. Make it work. You can do anything.
Best Luck Dads,
Brandon Holsey
