Dear brother; you may have stolen from me, but I feel sorry for you; here's why.
(Gawhhhh, c'ammoonn! Why'd ya go and do that?)
You currently possess a brand new, state of the art smart phone, a debit and credit card that you can't use, a $5 Thai wallet, $20 and some not very nice life points...
Tell me about yourself...
When you wake up in the morning, is it to the specifically chosen sound of the list in your phone's alarm settings? You know the one that's not too annoying, the one that urges you from dreamland, but that you don't like too much so it forces you to actually wake up?
When you toss over to turn that sound off and embrace the day, despite what's ahead, do you look at the screen for the time?
Do you spend some extra time, comforted in the warmth of last night, under the covers, flicking through the notifications you got while you were sleeping?
Did mom text you? Did your brother send you a funny video on Facebook? Do you have an important reminder for today: better pick your son up from soccer practice tonight!
When you get up, do you take your phone with you to the toilet? Scrolling through whathaveyou's while you sit there doing your business? (Who reads newspapers anymore?)
Source:
When you're in the shower/getting ready do you pop on some music? Maybe connect to Youtube or Soundcloud, letting your favorite songs spin into your ears, maybe belt out some tunes, get a little sudsy, have a little party?
Do you by any chance, once you've got yourself all fresh to death, make breakfast?
Well, now that you've made that delicious breakfast, do you take a quick picture of it to share with all of your buddies on social media? No? K, maybe you snap a selfie of well... some part of your body for someone on your contact list's pleasure?...
Do you put the phone in your pocket and take off for work/your day?
If anyone needs you, they can just quickly and easily access you- your friends have your number, you are signed into all of your social media accounts, email etc. You're fully connected and that phone comes with you all day long. Wherever you go, it goes. Ammiright?
Let's make this interesting brother... I'm curious to know if you've ever thought about this...
When your wife is in trouble, does she recount the numbers she has committed to memory? The specialized group of numbers that dial her directly to you? (No, because we have contacts on our phones to save said numbers! Without her contacts, she probably wouldn't be able to call!)
When you need directions, when you are lost and need to find a way home, do you consult your GPS or call a friend for directions?
When your pipes break, power goes out, internet stops, termites take over your home, you fall, break your foot and need a ride to the nearest ER, do you look online to find someone to call? Then once the miracle of the internet has provided an answer, do you make that call?
When your baby takes her first steps, are you right there, phone in hand, documenting it, video-taping it, sharing it on all of your social media accounts?
These all seem like reasonable, normal things most people do... let's carry on...
Hey brother, when you are traveling in a new country, do you take your phone with you?
Yes of course right? You need to be able to find your way, bring up travel documents, connect with family back home!
What about your wallet?
You have to bring that with you to pay for things at least... You're not going anywhere without at least some money!
So, that means that while you're out there in the wild and unknown, every piece of you is tied into your personal belongings, your way to connect with your family, your documents to get you home, your credit and debit cards you have to give you access to get back home...
Do you place value in these items? Would you want to keep them on you so that they remained safe?
I wonder what you would feel like if someone took that comfort from you?
As you can see in the examples above, our phones are intimately intertwined with us. Taking one from someone is like ripping a piece of them off of their body. It's never going to be the same for you as it is for them. It's always going to mean more to them than any amount of value you could get from it.
I wish you would have thought about that.
You see my brother, although we all come from the same place, we are not all made the same.
I could choose to be mad at you, resent you, send negative thoughts your way... but not me. I won't be doing any of that.
I am not here to judge you.
You have your reasons for why you did what you did. I am here to remind you though that what you did was take a piece of someone's life, without their permission and that is something I would never and could never even think of doing to someone else but I forgive you, and love you anyway.
You robbed me not just of a personal possession that I worked hard to earn, you robbed me of my way to connect to my friends and family back home.
I had my possessions across my chest in a heavy duty purse, zippered up and on my side. I didn't leave my belongings on the beach for you to take. I had them right on my person and you struck. You struck so fast, I didn't even notice.
You know, I didn't even cry and I won't.
When the $700 USD phone was no longer in my purse, and my now unzippered, empty pouch was staring up at me, the first thing I felt was pity. I thought,
"Who would/could do such a thing?" ... "How sad."
You saw me, you pegged me, you struck and you stole from me but you didn't realize you left me with something.
See, as my friends around me found out that you had wronged me, they felt pity and sorrow... they offered me embraces and comforting words...
"We'll get a new phone tomorrow. Don't worry..."
Brother, as you'll be able to tell from the perfect condition, I had only just gotten that phone delivered to me by my brother from the States 2 months ago. I only had one trip with it before you took it for your own.
That phone was bought specially, brought half way across the world to me and now I can't even replace it. I can't walk into a store here and get a new one. They are not available for purchase here.
You weren't thinking about me.
You don't know me, you were only providing for yourself. Let me ask you though, why does providing for yourself have to inflict harm on someone else? Your brothers, your sisters? What made you resort to taking instead of earning?
I've always been a strong, motivated gal and I'm not easily pushed down.
I am resilient and luckily, prepared for people like you.
My cards you stole have been shut down and new ones on their way so you won't get anything out of them.
There was only about $20 USD in my wallet so, you know what? I hope you buy yourself a vegan meal with it.
As for my phone, despite it being my connection to the whole world and to everyone I love, all of my accounts and not to mention all of my memories,
I feel worse for you.
See, I get to wake up every day now, sure, without a phone and honestly, just so you know...
I do wake up to an alarm that I specifically chose to annoy me just enough to wake up...
I do check the time on my screen (I have no other clock, anywhere in my house)...
I do lay there for several extra minutes, checking my notifications and connecting to my loved ones back home and I love watching funny videos...
I do take my phone to the toilet and read my emails...
I do play music as I dance and sing wildly in the shower like no one is listening...
I do make myself epic breakfasts and I do take photos of them to share right here actually!...
I do put my phone in my pocket and bring it along with me on my day because it's how I am connected.
You know what else?
My friends and family do have my number to call me if they need to reach me but now I have to get a new number and have been completely locked out of some of my accounts...
I do use my phone for GPS multiple times a day...
I do use it to look up anything and everything from a restaurant to eat at to a taxi driver...
I do document everything, trying to hold onto the memories and share my life with the people I love back home...
I do bring my phone and wallet with me traveling because, I have to. I am as smart and reasonable as I can be, and yet, you now have these abilities, not I.
But you, you have to wake up every day knowing that whatever you got, was from taking from someone else.
2018 started as a year of huge loss turned opportunity for me.
I was celebrating, watching fireworks on the beach with hundreds of other excited humans, all gathered together in what I believed to be a union of peace. Everyone focused on the sparks in the sky and the promise of a new year.
Instead, I got a lesson.
So dear brother, remember... it is your heart that will do the time for this crime, not mine. I forgive you and I hope that you forgive yourself. More than that, I hope you never hurt someone in this way again. Ho'ponopono states that we can clear out negative karma and debt by presenting an ancient Hawaiian prayer, I will be doing that for you and hope you feel it.
To all my Steemian friends out there:
To be honest with you, I didn't ever in my life want to lose my phone but, like I said, it's a learning lesson. For me, a huge lesson in forgiveness.
Things they say that are applicable here:
No use crying over spilled milk
What's done is done
What will be will be
(This is me ready to take on NY, a huge smile that lasted even through the disappointment!)
If we can reframe our misfortune into learning experiences, nothing could ever go wrong because it would always be to our adventage. We are only getting smarter, braver, more compassionate/loving, stronger! <3 It's all about perspective! Never let anyone steal your smile for that would be the greatest crime of all!
XO.