I've categoriesed my relationship with people as a series of fortunate events all leading to one single unfortunate feeling.
The terrible anguish of missing someone.
Everybody misses somebody right?
Everyone has that one name that no matter how long it's been since you've heard it, you still feel the faint pain of missing them.
People, the memories associated with them, the feeling of comfort that comes with them.
For me it's something like this,
I meet someone.
I like them.
We're having fun.
We have too much fun and one fine day we talk.
About the things that matter.
We talk some more, have more fun.
Talk until we're so comfortable with each other.
Talk until we love each other.
We do everything together and everything is this blissful memory.
We fight, we argue, we fix things.
Then we talk and we're each other's pillar, we're family.
Then we fight. We fight. We fight.
We don't talk , we yell.
We don't say I love you or you're my best friend,
We just don't say anything.
Until I'm alone all over again.
Until everything we had is invalidated.
Until I'm forced to believe yet once again that everybody leaves.
And all I'm left with is the constant pain of missing them.
This festering pain that's reminding me of how I messed up.
The painful reminder of how happy I used to be even when I wasn't.
The harsh realisation that I'm just an empty shell of a person.
The next thing you know, I'm waking up months later crying because I can't remember your voice or your smile or your perfume.
I'm waking up years later still crying because I miss you.
I wonder if I'll ever stop.
~S.C
Shot on the one plus 5T.
Have a beautiful day ❤️