Being to Critical of Yourself
We all want to be the best version of ourselves, but there is a thin line between striving to be better and tormenting ourselves because we're not. But if you're not more indulgent and kind toward yourself, how could you except others to show this behavior? The first step to a happier life starts from being more compassionate with yourself and showing more love toward yourself.
Feeling Bad for Things You Can't Control
It's not your fault that it was raining outside and the traffic is horrid and you can't make it on time to work just like it's not your fault that your parents got divorced or the company you've hoped to work for decided to hire someone else. Everything we do is connected to what other people out there are doing and we can't control their actions, we can only control the way we feel about them.
Not Being Able to Get over Your Errors
We often make the mistake of believing that our errors are permanent. When we have a setback, we tend to dramatise, think the worst about ourselves and imagine we would never be able to get over our error. But the truth is that most mistakes can be fixed. All it takes is an open mind and a positive attitude, one that helps you learn from your mistakes instead of feeling guilty ever after.
Refusing to Be in Charge of Your Life
If you are constantly whining about everything that's happening around you, but also refuse to change anything about it, you are making yourself miserable. If you are not in charge of your own life, someone else will be and they might probably not act with your beat interest in mind.
Try to make a clear distinction between what you can and you can't change and try to be more proactive regarding the first. No one else is responsible for your well-being but yourself.
Pretending to Be Someone You Are Not
Today, it is socially compulsory to fit into different roles. It's normal to pretend at work and smile in front of annoying customers, but it's absolutely harmful to always pretend all the time. If you feel like doing this just because you want to be accepted in a circle of friends or a relationship, those are probably not the right places to be in. Try to find people and activities that reflect your preferences and values and invest energy in nurturing them instead of wasting time creating a false persona for yourself.
You are the master of your own life and weather you choose to live it in peace with yourself or in a constant state of conflict is up to you. If there's not much you can do about how others see and approach you, there's a lot you can do in order to stop inflicting unhappiness on yourself.
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