Who is to blame.

I wonder how long i can keep up with this..the smiling face is an outward expression of a dying soul,a soul dying within.

Who is to blame?

Sometimes i wonder if am at peace with the forces of the universe or if am been tested?but then why should i be tested and why me,why not some other soulless creature,but then again am i deserving of what i seek,am i not also some soulless creature like every mortal Man roaming the earth.Why then do i seek AT-ONE-MENT will all the forces of the universe?

If what they say is true,that love is all that matters then why so much soul searching,why is the so said"LOVE"hard to come by.So many questions been asked very few answers been gotten.

Life is far from what mama told me it would be,why so?did she lie to me all those years or was she just too scared to tell me the truth,that hard truth that life is a living hell or can i say is a bed of thorns,or better still the sunny days she talked about are still yet to arrive.if so,all i can do is wait which beings me back to the shocking truth that waiting is truely my VIRTUE.