This article is for women only. It does not devalue the male sex in any way, but it is intended to summarize the most common mistakes women make in seeking a dream relationship with the ideal man.
Because the female sex is more emotional and for him to find a relationship is more of a priority, we tend to make more compromises at the beginning of an emerging relationship.
It is often these compromises that are thin threads that, instead of bringing about serious and long-lasting relationships, make the connection end before it has begun. What are the things that make men retreat or become distant at the beginning of a relationship?
6 mistakes that we DO NOT allow with the new man in his life:
Do not agree to his first suggestion
Yes, I know you may like him very much and you have not been out for months with such an attractive man. But do not say "Yes" to his first suggestion, especially if your answer is accompanied by a trembling voice and a shine in the eyes.
Tonight you are busy, even if you are sitting on woolen socks on the couch before the next episode of Sex and the City. A quick consensus with the first option suggested by him means: I have nothing to do tonight as well as tomorrow, like any other evening, and I was looking forward to inviting me. You are my only hope for an interesting night. Even so, he does not need to know it.
He waits until the end of the evening and calls you for a meeting at the last moment - refuse.
Do not give him the signal that you are available every time he looks for you. This shows a lack of self-interest and privacy; lack of incentive to motivate him to fight for your attention.
No matter how much we talk about gender equality, their husbands are in the genetics of hunting, and they need challenges to conquer. You can be his challenge if you are not immediately available to any of his ideas.
Do not wait until the phone at any time of the day - do not even pick up the phone at any time of the day.
If you pick up the first ring, it means you're not busy. You do not have a personal life, there is nothing else to do, and you are waiting for him / by a capital letter / to call you.
You do not need to give him such a message. Just try your dress at the store or get a sandwich, and then you'll pay attention to the phone. Your lunch and your new dress right now are far more important than communications.
If you do not pay attention to your lunch or your wardrobe and show him that he is much more important than them, how do you expect at a later stage to find your way of eating or dressing important? Show respect for yourself to get one from others, including the man you go out with.
You: Will we see you tonight?
He: Well, I'm with the guys in a game, if I'm not tired then I'll call you.
Let them and when they call you after the game, you're already busy - go out with a girlfriend, go to the gym or read a good book. You are not available or on call to respond whenever he is not tired.
You have your own interests and enjoyable ways to spend your time and he has to get the message that you do not intend to be "thickening the time if he's not tired."
Do not deny a girl's girlfriend's party or gathering with colleagues for the fact that he is free on Saturday.
You have a personal life, friends and other people who are also important, and he can free his Sunday or Friday if he's important to see you.
Show that your privacy is important and he will try to find a place in it, not the other way around. The opposite shows: You are more important than my personal life. My personal life will have to adapt to you.
Do not give up your hobby for an appointment
If you want to spend more time with it, you tend to postpone hours of yoga, tennis or painting and you start doing it often, it's also a message that you do not respect yourself yours.
If this man really cares about you, he'll do his best to see you. You do not have to subdue peaks and postpone your own interests for any other person.
If you show respect for yourself and show that you value yourself - your personality, your interests, your free time, etc. - you can expect that others, including men, will respect and appreciate you.
All these quick tips have heard them many times, but when the dreamed man appears, we seem to forget them. The truth is that any behavior mentioned above gives the man the message: "I am ready to see you!" What does the man hear this message? - "I can call her at the last minute and still count on her. I can look for her when I have no other interesting plans for the evening. She is so down on me, or so she wants to have a connection that I can afford to postpone meetings or do it when I find it convenient. " Or worse - "I'll try out first in another place and if it does not happen, I'll call on it."
You do not want to be the girl in second place? This puts you in a dependent position as a person who is always ready to be in touch with the other. There is nothing wrong with compliance, but not when it happens at the beginning of the relationship, even before we have a connection.
Often we, in our quest to start a serious relationship and have someone close to each other, take care, clutch, sacrifice, and give ourselves more than we need. We put our friends in the background, refuse meetings with acquaintances or weekly visit to the masseur, just to keep up with his free time.
With each of the above, we show a lack of self-esteem. "I put everything else for you in second place." If we do not respect our personal preferences, interests, friends, how can we expect that he will also respect our personal lives and ourselves?
Everything above sounds like female tricks that aim to knit the man or make a woman hard to reach. In fact, it does not - it all shows self-esteem and a healthy personality boundary, and equally important for both female and male sex.
If we have a person who postpones our important things on our behalf, will we look at it as a challenge that is worth fighting for? Will we respect his right to privacy, interests, friends or hobby?
If, after the second month of our relationship, the half stops to go to the gym and spends Sunday with the remote on the couch, will we continue to respect him as a man? Hardly.
The same applies to men. They need to see a confident woman, self-esteem, interest, and personal life. If we are willing to abandon all of ours for meeting a man, we should not expect either respect or even interest.
Much love - Krisii
photo source - https://pixabay.com