Parenting is a skill and it is not easy to be a parent, it is even more difficult when parenting is done by only one parent. In other words, parenting is easier and more effective when it is done by both parents.
It is one thing to be a father, it is another to father a child, anyone can be a father but not all fathers father their child, this is simply because they are not involved in their child's life.
An involved father is one who is sensitive, warm, close, friendly, supportive, intimate, nurturing, affectionate, encouraging, comforting and accepting...Source
In our society today, mothers seem to be overly attached to their child that they happen to be the parent more involved in their child's life and it's good because nothing can replace the love a mother has for her child, but it's even better and makes much difference in the child's life when his/her father is also attached or involved.
The importance of a father in his child's life cannot be overemphasized.
Research has shown that human beings are social animals and learn by modelling behaviour. This implies that whatever behaviour a child sees the father put up will to a large extent shape his behaviour of what he considers acceptable.
If a female child has grown with a father that is gentle, caring and loving, she would look out for those qualities in a man if she wants to starts a relationship since those are the qualities she is used to. If a male child grows with a father that is gentle, loving, caring, protective.Off course, he would want to be like his dad and so he would model his dad's behaviour. If his dad turns out to be abusive and domineering, he most likely would also model this behaviour.
If you are a parent, you will agree with me that your children ask lots of questions, both those you have answers to and those you do not have answers too...lol. This is simply because they expect a whole to from you. A child considers his father his hero and a responsible dad will use this as an opportunity to teach him values. Values like what is morally acceptable and what is not, how to face the world, how to carry himself, how to live within their means and practical ways to be financially responsible and independent.
If a father has a good relationship with his child, it has a positive effect on the child's self-esteem. It to a large extent determines whether the child will grow into a confident, courageous, strong and independent human. A good relationship with the child also helps the child overcome insecurity issues, research has shown that a child whose father is involved in his/her life has a great chance of excelling in their academics and a child whose father is not, might likely drop out of school.
In recent times a lot of things have changed and fathers are no longer only the protective and authoritative figure but are now involved in care-giving. Just like mothers,fathers put babies to sleep, calm them down when they cry, feed and bath their babies. Research has also shown that fathers who are involved with their child from very tender age build a stronger connection with their child than fathers who are not and as a child grows into a teenager this connection gives him an opportunity to build a trust-based relationship with the child. Having a trust-based relationship with the child enables him/her to share their life experiences as a teenager so that he can guide or advice the child properly.
An involved father creates time to play with his child, assist his child in doing his assignment or assist him in school work, honours his child's invitation(it could be his child's end of the school year party), an involved dad will continue to support his child even as an adult, he would apologize to his child when he is wrong.
When dad is actively involved in parenting,mum will feel his support and mum will be happy, if mum is happy the children will be happy as well. So being an involved dad does not only benefit the children,it benefits the mum too. This implies that being an involved dad promotes unity in the family.
So Dear Dad, be involved! Yet to be a dad? Also prepare and plan to be involved!
Thanks for reading!
