Well, that's a load of crap
Oh girl.
We know that national TV is not necessarily Angelina Pivarnick’s thing. There’s a reason that she left Jersey Shore two seasons in, and hasn’t really made much of a splash in anything else since. The MTV show is still her major reality TV accomplishment to date, and even then she’s known by some fans as that girl that left before Deena Nicole Cortese came in.
Now, while we loved to hate her in the original Jersey Shore, the one-time reality TV star left from her quick visit to see her old co-stars in a pretty crappy way…
Oh S**t
Angelina Pivarnick has spent a fair amount of time running from the pretty ridiculous nickname “Staten Island Dump.” While she may have gotten that nickname back in her original Jersey Shore days, the reality TV personality certainly earned it while she visited Jersey Shore Family Vacation in Miami.
A lot went down in the last episode of Jersey Shore Family Vacation. There was talk of a proposal (make sure to see that video at the end of the article), an unexpected visitor and, of course, Angelina couldn’t just leave without a memorable going away party.
Angelina originally came down to finally make nice with her former co-stars, Jenni “JWoww” Farley, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino, DJ Pauly D and Vinny Guadagnino. And surprisingly, it worked.
However, official house mom JWoww was elected to tell the woman previously known as the “dirty little hamster” that she had to get out after a few days of hanging around the home.
This newest episode of the show revealed that Angelina took the news… pretty well? Like, a ton better than we or any of the Jersey Shore castmates could have predicted or hoped for. In fact, she took it so graciously that the crew decided to go out and celebrate their new reconnection (which was of course, brought about by our boy Pauly D just trying to prank everyone).
However, in the process of partying, one person went a little too hard. And by “one person,” we mean Angelina, and by “a little too hard,” we mean so hard that she literally pooped her pants.
Yes, really.
It Gets… Worse?
On the way home, the girls all rode in one cab and the guys in another. At one point in the all-female cab, Jenni smelled something suspicious, and asked if someone farted. Angelina admitted she was the source of the foul smell, but it sure wasn’t a fart.
“I’m so sorry, guys. I sharted in my pants,” she said. “It’s not just a shart. I s**t my pants. So sorry.”
Snooki immediately went into serious mom mode, insisting that she was overreacting.
“No, I really don’t think you shit,” Nicole comforted her former enemy. “I think you’re being dramatic.”
“Should I check my underwear?” Angelina asked, which is totally a normal thing to ask a group of women that you spent years publically feuding with.
Well, it turns out she was right, leaving the rest of the girls (and poor Deena Nicole Cortese, who only got her gig on the shore because Angelina had left) just absolutely stunned. And we can’t say that we necessarily blame them, because uh… what can you do?
“I think it’s on the seat, actually,” Deena said.
“I s**t on the seat,” Angelina confirmed. “I’m gonna put [my underwear] in a bag so I can bring them home with me.”
The girls were howling and in literal actual tears by the time they got home, where I guarantee they did NOT tip that cab driver enough (because absolutely nothing could be enough at that point). And because of who they are as people, the gang obviously rushed to tell the boys exactly what had happened on the cab ride home.
And if at all possible, it only got grosser from here.
Angelina was obviously upset, embarrassed, and likely starting to sober up (because realistically, this seems like one of those situations that can to do that), but none of those things stopped her from screaming out of the bathroom and to the gang in the living room, “It was period sh*t.”
Vinny, always a man of the people, summed it up really nicely when he said, “I’m gonna throw up.”
Angelina eventually joined the gang, where she in no way tried to switch topics or take the attention off of herself. Instead, she just continued to talk about her “period s**t,” which literally no one understood (or admitted to understanding). Then, in an attempt to clarify, SHE TRIED TO SHOWED EVERYONE.
Yes, we mean that this woman that showed up to the house just days before took out her underwear and showed it to the gang.
(If you’re wondering who to publicly shame for looking, it was Deena and Snooki.)
All’s Well That Ends Well
Later, Angela literally cried about the situation, because she totally wasn’t the one to make it worse at all.
“I feel like everything was going smoothly, and then this happens,” Angelina said during her confessional later on. “It’s like, this can’t get any worse. Like, great. I’m just like so bummed out.”
She continued, saying “I’m thinking that all the guys think I’m a pig and I’m gross, and everyone in this house is gonna think I’m dirty now. I’m gonna leave this house like this? I didn’t wanna leave with this going on. Ugh, God. Everything was so great, and then I feel like I ruined it because everyone in this house thinks I shit my pants.”
Girl, no one thinks it. They know it. Because you literally decided to show everyone.
Anyways, with this newfound emotional turmoil, Angelina decided to wake up Snooki to cry about leavin the house on such weird and gross terms. Nicole gave the very best pep talk she could, considering she had also been drunk and dealing with a woman who had, lest we forget, literally pooped herself in a cab. It gave us one of the best quotes from this entire episode: “You’re crying over a shart.”
Angelina seemed in much better spirits by the time she left the next day, stating that she didn’t remember much from the night before. There was even talk of exchanging phone numbers!
In his infinite wisdom, the next day Ronnie said, “I gotta call Jen up and find out what a period shit is.”
“I don’t think it’s an actual thing,” Pauly D replied.
“But,” he added, knowing Jersey Shore’s popularity, “it is now.”