This question is raised time and again and has anyone ever really come up with the answer? Why on earth do we feel compelled to spend money on things we do not really need? Why do we purchase, accumulate and hold on to so much stuff? There are hundreds of blogs and Utube videos on this subject. More self help books on the bookstore shelves and available through Amazon, it would take five years to read them all. Still it carries on. If we could successfully answer this question, would we then not free ourselves, free our lives and actually pursuit things of more importance?
What are we striving for, what do we want to achieve, feel or be? What is the meaning of the stuff? We all know we don't take it with us when we go. Do we really own it, or does it own us?
Excess material possessions do not necessarily enrich our lives. Purchasing a multitude of things keeps us from experiencing some wonderful life giving benefits. If we could really take a look and realize the cause we could actually become more vigilant in overcoming it.
Life has a natural tendency to become filled with more. We are rarely looking to downgrade, to simplify, to eliminate, to reduce . Our natural inclination is to accumulate, to add, to upgrade, to build upon.
But do we really know why? How much thought goes into this and is the end result of all the stuff we own giving us what we want or need to find happiness, peace and contentment?
Do we not understand that all the stuff really ends up owning us and taking up a huge amount of our time, energy and head space.
This has been approached at from so many angles it's exhausting, but still it continues everywhere. So why do we do it, accumulate and hold on to so many things.? I believe it's fear. Fear causes us to continually purchase items we do not really need and hold to so much more of what we are never really going to use. Yes fear.
We keep a lot of clothing and other similar items as we feel they are part of our self-expression. There is a fear of not having the options to choose should we have a lot less. We fear not having a choice, we would limit our self expression. We like to have options, so we fear not having any. Last but not least we really fear we are not good enough the way we are without these items.
We hold onto all types of sentimental items because we don't want to loose that memory. That time, that place, that relationship, that lover, that day, that event, that special friend or family member. Are we not really fearing that we are losing the love of that relationship, the meaning of what those items hold for us. Is there a fear that the love we have now is not good enough?
We hold onto things we never use anymore, because one day you may need them. You never know. But we never do. We fear lack of safety or certainty. Could we just not be certain we would never use this item again. Ever.
We fear being vulnerable to sadness and loss that we had no control over and we use objects to fill those voids. We fear being rejected if we were not accepted in our early lives. Again we choose objects to help us cope.
So we could go on and on but we get the point. But in reality all possessions that are not absolute necessities are purchased or kept for different degrees of fear. We want to feel comforted, free from anxiety. We want to feel prepared and secure. Loved and noticed. We want to be certain about our future. We want to know that we will be OK. In reality our stuff does not do any of these things. We hope they do, but they do not. It is a cycle that never ends.
So what can we do and what is the solution?
We need to find better ways to cope with our fears.
However, that is another post. So until then.
Namaste
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