If you build your whole life on one perfect picture, and that picture shatters no wonder you're going to feel wrecked.
Don't Bet on A Single Horse
Though this may sound very logical and makes sense to most people when it comes to investing or even choosing a career path, I'm noticing more and more that people don't absorb this principle in their personal life. Here's the thing: if you design your life so that the only reason you can be happy is if, let's say your family stays together. Then all that needs to happen for your life to fall apart is a divorce letter from your wife. Therefore you need other 'pillars' in your life to build your happiness and other values on.
How To Spread the Foundation of Your Life
We all have needs, and values in life. The main way the make sure your life is founded on multiple, separate things is to spread or copy your needs and values amongst them. Therefore, if let's say your contributing to your community and this is meeting some of your needs and adding to your values, that is a nice way to spread from let's say doing the same at home with your family. However, if your family is part of that community, you run the risk of it all being taken away. Therefore you have to make sure that you spread the fulfilment of your needs amongst many different places and many different activities if you want to make sure they can survive a big blast to your personal life.
Negativity
I know this sounds very negative, sort of: hope for the best, plan for the worst. Yet, as one of my teachers, Dr. Richard Bandler says: 'Disappointment takes adequate planning'. If you understand that your life isn't being run by something or someone but you yourself are the one holding the reins, this also means you have the responsibility of spreading the foundation of your life. So do a little thought experiment: is there something that could happen to your situation right now, whether it is losing your job, losing your spouse, losing your ability to walk etc etc, that could rip a hole in your foundation of happiness in life?
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