Oh yes, you read that heading right!
I am pretty sure we have read, heard and seen it all when it comes to healthy living.
Everyone talks about living healthy, tips on losing weight, how to eat the right foods and all whatnot…
But then no one has ever talked about how to live an unhealthy life. So if you are probably wondering, here are some really insightful tips on how to live your life being unhealthy.
Trust me, these things work!
Rule number 1: Never ever exercise!
Studies have shown that when you exercise, you increase blood circulation.
But then, Who really needs all that blood circulation? Yeah, we know blood circulation helps our heart to function properly, helps to avoid heart problems and all that, but then, a little heart disease never hurts that much… it only kills.
Other reasons for exercising is shown on this pic below…
Looking at the above critically proves exercise is not really a do or die affair…
I mean, a little body fat never hurts, it only leads to obesity.
When it comes to increased lifespan… We are all going to die someday, why prolong the inevitable?
Do not get me started on the decrease of stress! The thought of going out to jog every morning is enough to give anyone the stress of a lifetime!
It is better to live with the little stress you have now. The worst that would happen is, you will probably get hypertensive and have a heart attack.
Your memory is not perfect, but you can manage.
Your mood is always bad and depressive, but no one is complaining. You are only losing friends every day, but who really needs people? #SoloLiving
Rule number 2: Eat Unhealthy Foods
We all have one life to live. Some people have decided to make it better by producing foods rich in cholesterol and sugar. These foods have been sanctioned by food controlling bodies. Who were you to say no to buying and consuming high amounts of these foods.
They are the sweetest and cheapest out there. I mean, compare how much you will spend if you decide to eat a balanced diet daily, to feeding on only fatty foods and sugar-rich foods all day every day.
Did I hear you say you could get diabetes, hypertension and other related diseases?
Oh well, you are trying to live unhealthy people, those are just minor hiccups you have to deal with!
Rule number 3: Never, I mean never ever go for checkups!
Another perfect tip for living an unhealthy life is to never visit the hospital for a routine medical checkup.
Oh, c'mon, Who has all that time to sit in the hospital’s waiting room forever waiting for results when you know they would probably find nothing?
Do you know how many movies you could see and how many calories you could spend your precious time consuming during that period?
You might be thinking; What if they find something? Well, I believe if you are concerned about living an unhealthy life, then you should probably know;
What you do not know would not kill you.
I bet most of us have heard that before. You might as well apply it in this situation.
The worst that would happen is the disease you might have would degenerate beyond medical help and would lead to death.
It is just death, it is not a big deal!
Rule number 4: Sleep, Sleep, Sleep.
Another important and indeed less stressful tip to an unhealthy life is sleeping. Your mantra should be… if you are not eating, then you should be sleeping. Sleep as much as you like. Sleep immediately after breakfast, (which has to be heavy enough to make you sleep), have a nap after a lunch of cholesterol and sugar. Do not forget to leave like 9 hours aside every night for another unhealthy dose of sleep. Take sleeping meds if you have to… After all, you have an unhealthy living point to prove.
The worst it could lead to is stroke and death, nothing serious.
Rule number 5: Partake in as little mental activity as possible.
Think of all the work your brain does each day. Is it fair to give it more work by trying to partake in activities that challenge the brain?
Mental activity challenges your brain, keeping you alert all day.
But then, Who needs an alert brain if you are going to be spending all day sleeping? Let the geniuses handle the brain challenges. I would suggest you rather stay on my bed, glued to your tv or smart phone, consuming as much calories as you can.
Rule number 6: Develop a new bad habit.
This is perhaps the best of them all. Make a choice of something you have to consume every day. It has to be something they all warn about. If you decide on cigarettes, smoke as much as two packs a day. Who cares about lung cancer? The unhealthy living is our watchword!
If alcohol is your flair. Do not allow any fish to drink as much as you. Keep them bottles coming. Vodka, beer or any other. Make sure you do not stop downing those bottles until you get into a state of stupor
Yeah... That’s the life, the unhealthy life!
Take no thoughts on how much damage it is doing to your kidney and other vital organs. You can always afford a transplant or worse still end up dead. But then, what is so bad about dying young?
So there you have it guys!
If unhealthy living is your primary aim here on earth, I bet you will find these tips highly useful.
HOWEVER!
The truth is, no one actually wants to live an unhealthy life. But then we find ourselves doing most of the above mentioned, which is doing us no good at all. It is rather taking us closer to our graves.
My little advice... Start taking good care of yourself today, and avoid activities that damage your health.
Thanks for your time
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