...God is a gentleman, He doesn't force his adherents into doing against their wish. When we want our space, He allows it. Unfortunately, our struggle can become our primary focus. We don't intend to worship our sufferings, but when we are stuck, we do it unintentionally and become devoted to it.
This excessive devotion may then turn into a form of unintentional idolatry that has prolonged a normal period of spiritual struggle into a long term disconnection from God.
One thing is certain- God desires you, whether or not you believe, He does. He is the main source of your resilience and this disconnection must be addressed before you bounce back from the hurts that have kept you down or stuck.
Bridging this disconnection requires risk. We must allow ourselves to be vulnerable and transparent before God. Inviting him into a discussion about the areas of your life that you may have unknowingly prohibited Him from entering previously.
We have nothing to lose in doing this.