That's touching. I suffered panic attacks since I was 14, and had some really dark times when I felt scared even to take my beloved dog for a walk. Those times are a thing of the past now and I live an almost normal life but still, when I have to plan a trip I feel the same mix of excitement and anxiety you wrote about in your beautiful post. Here's a funny thing: the "cobblestone streets" are my streets, I live very near to Rome (search for Castel Gandolfo on Google if you're curious!) and I'd like to visit some relatives and friends I have in USA and Canada! As for your question, I think I never felt "my own hero" but there are moments where I felt proud of me for mantaining the calm despite the fact all was going wrong around me. Last time it probably was when I had to run in the night to find an oxygen tank for my mom which was unable to breath for she have ALS and a very bad pneumonia. While driving to the pharmacy I noticed that I was worried for my mom's life, but ready to accept whatever could have happened. And probably there's the "secret" to fight our fears: stop trying to control everything and start living day-by-day, accepting what life give us and adapting like water to best fit our spaces. Screaming "I don't care", and doing what we have to do!

May you travel to the best places for the rest of your life! <3