I am a video game addict. That means I cannot control how much play time I get in a single session, and I cannot control how much I get throughout a week or month. If I start playing, I can't do it for just a reasonable amount of time. I've spent thousands... No, tens of thousands of hours playing video games. I've tried multiple times to stop, for good, and get on with my life into more productive endeavours, and to develop my social life. I've tried multiple times and have failed in each one of them. I've written another article roughly discribing my past and my relationship with videogames. It was at the day I wrote that article, that I embarked into that same journey, again. But, this time, I have a few more tools in my arsenal to battle the beast. So... Why did I fail to quit gaming before?
First, I'll begin by evaluating why I played video games. I do believe that people, and, for a certainty, I, wouldn't play much of video games if they had a stable life. That is definitely my case, or was my case. I was heavily bullied throughout my life, from childhood and into my late teens. I found video gaming to be a refuge from all of it. I wasn't bullied in video games, and it was a good way to forget about all the evil around me. While playing video games, I was at peace. There was nothing else in my mind. Video games did, yes, serve me well, in that regard. I don't know how I would have coped with what was happening at the time, without them. Maybe I would have turned to drugs to cope, even if I'm not the type to experiment with such substances. Maybe I would have become a bully myself. I don't know. Luckily, I won't ever get to know that.
Different people react to the same stimuli in different manners. My cousin did too isolate into video games while he was growing up. That wasn't enough for him, though. He started to smoke cannabis and drinking alcohol. Fortunately, he didn't develop problems with alcoholism and didn't try any stronger drugs. Unfortunately, he's now battling with tobacco addiction. I know plenty of people whom I used to call friends who went into harder stuff. Some people told me they have tried ecstasy. Others have tried acid. Every single one of them, though, had some family problems.
What I'm trying to get at, with this, is that the addiction itself is never the root of the problem. It's merely a symptom. It is a coping mechanism that people have found not to succumb to the pain. It may not be the best solution to the problem, or it is no solution at all, but it is what they have found to not get into a worse situation. Indeed, there are people that find comfort in nothing, and some that even take their lives because of it. It's a truly tragic thing, and I completely sympathize with the pain. They didn't deserve what they went through, as they were just children or teenagers, and didn't do anything to be punished for.
This is why I'm writting this article. I want whoever is reading this to know that there are more people going through similar situations as you may be going through, and that there are solutions to the problems you may be going through. There is reason and evidence, there is great creativity being shared throughout the world. There is love. It may not even be you who is going through any such problems, but maybe you know someone who is going through it. You can help them. Through information, caring and love, people can overcome their difficult past or present. Whether it is something they overcome in a few weeks or months or even years, with how much knowledge we have accumulated as a civilization, we can overcome the damage caused by child abuse.
So the root of my addiction was child abuse. Many people share this same origin. It also helped that I have an addictive personality. Whenever I get my mind into something I love, I don't really think of much else. I'll get into binge watching shows, I'll binge watch trilogies (uncut Lord of the Rings trilogy, anyone?) and I'll even so such things as exercise for ridiculous amounts of time. I've injured myself practicing too much of... everything, but mainly it was kicking. I have a passion for Taekwondo, and I would practice kicking for hours, every day. Eventually, my hip flexors gave out. But, of course, I take responsability for this. I was feeling just fine, with practicing so much, and didn't correctly listen to my body saying it wouldn't work out. I've learned from it, though, and this is behavior I can very well control. It's not like video gaming.
I am not under abuse from anyone else, anymore, and haven't been for multiple years now. I do have some remnants of the abuse, in ways I act, or, more accurately, avoid acting, but I'm conscious of them, and it's nothing near crippling. I am not depressed, anymore. So, why do I still want to play video games? It's not good for me, it takes a massive amount of time from my day. Time that I could be spending on reading more books, learning something online, playing music, composing music, practicing martial arts, exercising, learning more about health, talking to other people, developping my social skills, developping a community of like minded people, amassing wealth. These are all among the things I am passionate about and that I feel I need to be doing to reach happiness. I know video games will not contribute at all to reach happiness, but I still play them.
As such, I don't think there is any other explanation than addiction. There was a time, a long time, even, in which I considered: "hey, could it be that I'm just a lazy bastard who doesn't actually want to do anything with his life? Maybe this is just who I am, and all those things I dream about aren't really something I care for...". But that's not true. I'm not lazy, quite the opposite. I can't just sit on a couch and watch TV all day, in fact, I don't even have my TV connected to power. It's too passive, it's boring. I don't ever stay lying in bed just doing nothing, or sleeping for ungodly lengths of time. I don't even enjoy sleeping. It's boring! I've proven through how much I exercised, how much I practiced music, how much I've worked in previous jobs and other activities that I am definitely not lazy. I am addicted. Have you known of people confused for the same reasons? Have you, yourself ever considered the same?
Before moving forward, I want to acknowledge that not everyone is like this, when it comes to video gaming. Not everyone who plays video games is addicted to the activity, it's actually a very small minority of people who present the behavior related to addiction. It's estimated to be between 2 and 10% of video gamers. It's a small number, but the reality may be scarier. According to statistics, 97% of children are video gamers, and that means that almost 10% of children may be addicted to video games. That's a scary thought.
Possible Benefits and Problems
It's been theorized there may be some benefits to playing video games. Through playing games, you will develop some proficiencies, your brain will become better at certain tasks. Among those may be attention improvement, visuospatial skills, among other cognitive functions. None of the benefits are uniquely gained from video games. You could develop them with other practices, too.
There are, though, risks associated with video gaming, even for those not addicted.
Health Decrease
Because you may spend less time physically active, spend less time outside absorbing vitamin D, sitting for extreme amounts of time (sitting is the new smoking, as they say) and have less stable sleeping schedules, or go to sleep later at night. In my experience, people who game do go to bed later, as they have no real reason to take advantage of day light.
Social Problems
Because you may be playing video games, you could be cutting time you would otherwise be spending with people developping your social skills, verbal skills, and creating a community or creating connections for work or career climbing. Indeed, social anxiety has been demonstrated to be one of the side effects of the dopamine overstimulation caused by video games and even other Internet activities.
We are a tribal species. We need other people to thrive and to, at all, be content with our lives. I've never met anyone who truly enjoys being alone, and hearing of such people is rarer than a day in which I don't stumble my little toe when walking around the house in the morning. The more time you spend playing video games, the less you spend with people. I know a lot of people who are not addicted to video games who will still spend time alone because they are too lazy to just get out of the house and go do something with friends. And why would they? Video games are so accessible and can be played from the comfort of your home. Even more fun, for reasons I will explain further ahead.
Monetary Costs
We spend money on computers, we spend money on some software, we spend money on computer repairs, on Internet connection. That's all fine, it's a necessity of this age, if you want access to the great library of common knowledge of the Internet. I certainly do.
What I mean with monetary costs is not even about video games being purchased. I'm not against fun. I enjoy watching movies, board games, driving around in my car at a not so slow pace, having good food, even owning not so useful objects. That's all fine. What I mean is that, if you spend a bunch of hours a day immersed in a virtual world, you are not developping yourself into the best version you could possibly be of yourself. People who play video games won't, generally, read books, for instance. If you ask video gamers of culture, they won't know much. They won't know much of history, they won't know much of the state of the world. That's what happens when your main source of fun is not of this world. Correct me if I'm wrong, and you may have a different experience of this, but this is mine.
People of my generation (I'm 26) don't have much interest in a whole lot of culture and current events. People younger even more so, and the younger the more does it apply. I largely attribute it to video gaming. Even a lot of video gamers who don't show addictive behavior have spent thousands of hours in this activity. If you would take all that time and divide it by 10, and they would read books in that time, they would have read dozens or hundreds of books by then. I give the example of books, but I understand they're not for everyone. It could perhaps be a different activity. Learning any skill at all. Carpentry, martial arts, programming, cooking. All these things increase your overall value, as an individual. Video gaming? It may, too. There are professional video gamers and all, some playing competitively and others coaching. But for the vast majority of us, no, it's not a productive activity. Again, I understand people don't need to spend 24 hours of their day on productive activities, but, from my experience, people who play video games, play for hours and hours on end, every single day, and do next to nothing in self improvement.
Another Health Consideration
There is another problem, that could be in the health section, but I do think is important enough to separate from the rest, as it is quite a certainty. Screen time. The longer you spend looking at a screen, the more awake you will be throughout the day, and into night time. This is because you are looking at blue light, which could be called a simulation of day light. Because you are looking at light similar to sun light, the body recognizes that it is not time to be asleep, so you will not become sleepy. It's recommended to not look at screens for several hours before going to bed, and also to generally reduce your screen time, if you have trouble going to sleep or staying asleep. And, it's been proven over and over again, there's little or nothing that contributes to health as good, sound sleep. It doesn't matter how much you exercise, it doesn't matter how well you eat, how rich you are, how much of a good community you have - if you don't get appropriate sleep, your health will vastly deteriorate.
So why are video games addictive?
It all comes down to a hormone: dopamine. Dopamine is related to the rewards system of the brain. When video gaming, rapid release of dopamine occurs, which is similar to what happens when taking, for instance, ecstasy, or other heavy drugs. It's, then, easy to imagine how incredibly hard it is to deal with the cravings. Moreover, our bodies haven't had time to adapt to this new age of technology. Bright screens, hyperstimulating continuous rewards, hyperstimulating action activating the brain in ways similar to real danger. This leads to structural change to the brain, most importantly, I believe, is an unbalance of the rewards system. Some of the effects of this unbalance are:
- Low self control, inability to defer gratification
- Day to day activities and activities outside gaming become dull and boring
- Lower verbal inteligence and social information processing ability
Note: these effects don't occur only in video game addicts, even if in addicts are more observable.
So what does it look like quitting video gaming?
As you could imagine, none of the withdrawl effects are pretty, and they are similar to withdrawl effects from other addictions, even drugs.
- Sleeping disorders: sleeping patterns may be disturbed. Weird, repetitive, game craving dreams. Insomnia.
- Emotional distress: depression, emptiness, anxiety, irritability, mood swings, apathy, craving video games.
- Affected mind: trouble focusing, constant thoughts about gaming, massive boredom.
I'm sure you've all seen enough movies to know what withdrawl does to the mind. It will play tricks on you. "Oh, it's all going to be fine. You can absolutely control it, just start by taking one drink and that will be it". "It will be different this time". "It will make you feel better. If you take that shot, you'll be able to face all the other problems in your life, and, when you've resolved those, you can come back and take care of this one easily". "You can stop tomorrow. Let's just have this one more night of fun". The list is endless.
For me, what's always gotten me back into gaming was boredom. Extreme, never ending boredom. I couldn't find new activities that were half as exciting as gaming. I took up reading, practicing music more, among other things. When I felt massive cravings that I thought could take a hold of me, I would watch some shows. It does get better, though. I don't remember exactly how long my longest period without gaming was, but the cravings subside, and become much, much weaker as time goes by. The first few weeks are the worst, especially the first week. One of those times I stopped, I went the next day to work, cold sweating and incredibly anxious and even having some uncontrollable mild shaking. But it eases down.
There is no exact period of time until you are cleared from your addiction. Or, better said, you'll never be. But there is an estimated time in which the brain has had some time to adapt back into normal activities, which I've seen is around 90 days. Normal activities should be more interesting, from then on, and cravings will be easier to resist, as you will be entertained by other actions you can partake in.
I'm not sure what the perfect method would be to get rid of this vile ailment of the soul, but I strongly suspect that you will need other people to help you, even if it is just through conversation and keeping you honest about what you're doing. You will need to spend more time outside the house, and possibly get rid of your gaming platform of choice altogether. Being productive is incredibly important - keep your mind and body busy!
Finally, if you relapse, don't stress out to much because of it. It's expected to happen. Try to keep tabs on how long you went, the first time around, and how long you played for until you started quitting again. Try to beat that the next time around. As Confucius once said "It doesn't matter how slowly you go, as long as you don't stop."
Thank you so much for reading this article. If you enjoyed it, make sure to hit the vote button and share with your friends and family. I'm always looking forward to learning of what people think or feel when reading my work. Criticisms, life stories, they are all welcome, and I greatly appreciate you sharing. Do you have people in your life that have problems with video game addiction or excess? Do you, yourself?