Have you ever wondered what makes a hero? Why are soldiers portraying what a man should look like? How is it possible that a hero always defeats the villain? The reason behind this is fairly simple. They dare to be dangerous. They accept the monster within them to conquer their goals and get the respect they desire.
This is a resulting factor of one of the Big Five personality traits, called agreeableness. A too agreeable person becomes harmless, a so-called “good boy”. “Good boy” is a dog that listens to his owner and is depended on him. Such a dog can never become an alpha wolf. He doesn’t know how to be dangerous if you don’t teach him that. Other dogs won’t fear him and will either bully him or kill him. The same applies to human. If you are too agreeable people will pick on you and use your naivety to get something from you. You will become an easy target for the hungry wolves.
This attribute occurs in humans on an everyday basis in many different forms. It occurs so much that we even have a name for it. “Nice guys finish last”. There is a reason why women are more attracted to the right, confident man than an all-agreeable boy that wants nothing but to satisfy others. Society tells us that selfishness is wrong and don’t get me wrong, I agree that too selfish people are bad but everybody needs to be a little selfish first in order to start giving. There is a difference between being a selfish fuckboy and confident caring partner. A big one.
“The only defense against violent, evil people are good people who are more skilled at violence.”
- SGT Rory Miller
Face your inner monster
Let’s learn something from your favorite heroes.
Harry Potter
The only way Harry Potter was able to defeat Voldemort is because he accepted the Voldemort in him. The Horcrux was the monster he needed to feed and become, in order to defeat the monster that lied before him. He always broke the rules and talked to the snakes. That’s what made him dangerous, his inner darkness.
Bilbo Baggins
Bilbo was asked to go on a journey to defeat a dragon. However, Bilbo lived peacefully in his small village and never had to face anything, so when Gandalf asked Bilbo on a journey he needed to become a thief. He needed to become bad in order to help his friends.
Naruto
When Naruto was trying to control a demon (an actual demon) inside him, he went to the Waterfalls of Truth. In order to defeat the real demon, he first had to face his true self. Once he honestly accepted the monster as a part of him he managed to control the real demon.
Dare to be dangerous and brake the rules in order to go somewhere in life. You have to balance between order and chaos ( Yin and Yang), to make some positive progress in life.
But…
I’m not implying that you should go around beating everybody that frowns at you. IT IS THE IDEA THAT YOU COULD. Martial arts teach people to fight but they also teach when to fight. That’s very important because it’s better to have an arsenal at your disposal and don’t have to use it than to be vulnerable. People will have respect for you and won’t dare to take advantage of you. There is not only a physical aspect of it. You could be dangerous in many other scarier ways.
“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.”
-Matthew 5:5 (NIV)
meek (πραεῖς)- Is a Greek word which has many translations, one being: ”Those who have weapons and the ability to use them but determine to keep them sheathed”.
How to confront the darkness within you
If you are ready to dare, to confront and to conquer the obstacles of your life, start with throwing out the mask of “good boy”. That mask represents the persona of a good and kind person that you want people to see. You have to look underneath. Now, that’s is very difficult to do and requires a lot of patience and perseverance because you might get scared of what you might see. You have to accept it nevertheless because only then you are in control.
The truth is the only way and the only thing that matters. You have to uncover the monster you are deep down and control it. During the process, you will feel resentful and bitter. You might start developing new ideas and you have to speak about them. What if you start seeing some problem or oppression most people don’t see. As a matter of fact, you not only should look your monster in the eyes but you have to, it’s your moral obligation as you can bring so much good with it.
Just remember that you are in control, you are powerful beyond measures and have the strength to control this darkness within you. Don’t let it consume you. See the bigger picture.
Recommended sources:
Collected Works of C.G. Jung, Volume 9 (Part 1): Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious: 9.1
Amazon.com: Collected Works of C.G. Jung, Volume 9 (Part 1): Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious: 9.1 eBook: C…
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