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My last four days of family love and hope.
Day one:
I cried, I cried a lot because I felt that I needed something very important to do, since I was a little girl I have lived the absence of a loving father who accompanies me to celebrate Father's Day in school, the street, the church; always absent in my life, rancor, no! Nothing we gain in life with grudges but there is something that is very important, FORGIVE, Remove any root of bitterness that wants to take root in our hearts.
For the above mentioned, I took my savings, my car, invited my mother and traveled for 12 hours from Anzoátegui to the city of Puerto Cabello. It was wonderful hours to visualize and enjoy the natural landscape that is very different as you go through the states, the air, I stopped to have lunch with my mother in the Guapo, very rich, we bought pork rinds to take to my grandmother (mother of my mother), sing all the way, because I love music and my mother loves to sing when we travel.
It was 12.00 hours longer and fun with my mother, I love my family and for work reasons we live far away from her. Finally we arrived at Puerto Cabello at 9:00 p.m. and early I informed my cousins that we were on our way and I transferred money to buy meat, chicken, chorizo, chistorras, all for a giant grill and that none was missing, indeed it was, we sing, we eat and we throw many jokes of our childhood as always, hahaha really good jokes really, that's how I finished my first day.
Day two:
I literally rested for two hours and woke up, my beautiful grandmother had already made breakfast, arepas with parrot (egg with tomato and juicy onion) and cheese, I ate and went to my biological father's house, when I arrived the wife told me: Girl, if it was at night I swear I saw a fright! I smiled and asked him if he was my dad, he hit his head and I asked him to please call him I needed to talk to him.
Currently I am 32 years old, I have always been very focused and mature, I do not want another, when I was 13 I told him I needed to talk to him and I really needed answers because at that moment very strong things happened in my life and I felt so but so strong his absence, I needed someone to defend me from the bad he lived and his response was only a great silence, I grew up, I always surpassed her alone with my mother at my side.
Finally my father came out and I said, Blessing, He said: What happened? Why this sudden trip? I said: I need to talk to you, we went to the corridor and we sat down and said: I apologize for having questioned you when I was 13, you had your reasons and / or you just did not know how to face being a father at 20, just I want you to know that I thank God because I use you for your sperm fertilize my mother's egg and be born, to be who I am with defects and virtues, help, give, teach and also learn every day, thanks for that and I want to free you from guilt, I forgive you of everything that has ever passed through your mind and others in the social circle have accused you, life continues, maybe there are many years to elapse or possibly two days, be happy and never forget that Jesus Christ is the way, the truth and the life nobody comes to the Father but through Him.
We went to the house of my grandparents (Paternos) who died 3 years ago to visit my aunts, we shared a delicious meal and we talked for many hours, then I left him at home, he hugged me, I told them it was the second hug in 32 years old, the first was a year ago in the death of My Grandfather. I went to rest because I had to return the next day to Anzoategui.
Day 3:
We wake up, have breakfast, check all the fluids of the car and ready to return home; My grandmother performed the usual Prayer for us to bless our departure (It is a circle in the center of the room, holding hands), we all embraced as always and started the road.
While we were coming, I was silent, I did not sing and I did not speak since we left until we reached Valencia, my mother broke the silence and said: What do you have, daughter? And I just said nothing, she insisted and I told her that I was just grateful to God for having her, that for me she is the most important person in my life, that I thank her for working hard as a child to be able to buy me at least one compote and food, for his love, for being with me in the good, in the regular and in the bad, for stopping eating to give me, for always being there to listen to me and even to mourn with me, for his advice and words of encouragement and I encourage every time I feel that I faint ... I just want to thank you and tell you once again that you are the most important thing in my life and that I love you from my soul and with all my heart.
She just listened to me and told me, I love you daughter too, then she fell asleep and we continued the trip, this time change the route and we went through the plains, we stopped to have lunch in Zaraza some delicious cachapas with hand cheese and soup of beef in wood; And there were only 3:00 hours to go and we spent it singing all the way.
Finally we got home and I told them: I go to my house to take a bath and we go to eat Pizza and ice cream, they accompanied me My mother, my stepfather, my three brothers, my nephews, the sister-in-law and a friend with their daughter; We ate and talked until they closed the place, then everyone went home.
Day 4:
Already at 1:00 am of the 4th. Day I just came home, I bathed and I lay down to rest from the trip a few hours, I woke up at 6:00 a.m. I made my breakfast, I had a coffee and I went out to the yard to feed my dog, I saw the many birds flying among the fruit trees the beautiful sky, the earth, even the ants, and cry out to God saying: "Just as Jesus asked for mercy and that if you could pass in your life the cup of death you could do it, but that outside your will and not his, today I ask for mercy for the Earth, for your creation, but may it be your will and not mine. "
I went to my room, I turned on my laptop and began to write what happened to me in these last four days of life, I say course because I really trust in life expectancy more than in an ultimatum of death, I have always lived my life based on hope, if we live hopefully we will always be optimistic, the best reality that exists is one day after the other, each day brings its own evil, if today were my last day I would only thank God for giving me the opportunity to be born, live and have a wonderful family, a unique and special mother, brothers of whom to be proud of their achievements and mourn their failures, nephews to brighten the days with their occurrences, an excellent stepfather who is always there doing his father role very well.