Ever wonder : what motivates people?
You see it happen all the time.
Someone saving money to go on a trip but when it comes to buying food, they'll buy junk.
Or better yet a person who'll go out of their way and spend 700 dollars on concert tickets despite their lack of funds.
What does this all tell us? We prioritize what we truly value
That's why we're happiest and most fulfilled, when we're living in alignment to our core values.
So how do we find our core values: our internal beliefs and driving force behind our actions and emotions?
By being an spectator to your own behaviour and asking yourself these 5 questions:
1. What experiences were the most meaningful to you ?
When you reflect back on your happiest moments, what do you see?
Is it jet skiing on the warm shores, exploring a new city? Or speaking in front of an audience and having what you say resonate with them?
Focus on the positive emotions and pinpoint what exactly was going on. Write it down.
For example :
jet skiing --> value adventure
exploring -> value travel
public speaking --> value leadership
2. When did you feel the highest negative emotions? (suppressed values)
Now go in the opposite direction and focus on the times you felt negative emotions such as anger, frustration, sadness or hurt.
What was happening then?
For example : I personally feel frustrated when I see someone spending money they don't have. Why? Because I value financial security
3. Who/What do you envy?
Here's the thing : we want what we don't have, but sometimes what we don't have isn't always best for us
For example :
If you find yourself envying people who travel , or work as digital nomads, chances are you value travel.
Whereas, if you're envious of people who have luxury vehicles and expensive clothing, chances are you value materialism more than experience.
Pay close attention : those feelings of "envy" serve as an internal clue into what you value.
4. What do you spend your money on?
Aside from the bare essentials like food, clothing, and shelter, what do you find yourself spending your hard earned cash without blinking an eye?
If it's activities like kayaking, snowboarding, hiking, you value experiences
Whereas if it's online courses and audiobooks, you value knowledge.
What makes you, you?
Any close friend or family member will associate you to something.
Whether it be your passion for jeeps or zest for writing, there's something about you that defines you at your core.
When you're not actively engaging with it, you feel unfulfilled. You'll be surprised to realize what it is.