Once when I was a portrait painter, a client asked me to paint a nude portrait of her. And though this was to be a nude painting, not once did she have to remove any of her clothing. She gave me a lovely photograph of her face and kindly asked me to paint another woman’s body on to it from yet another photo that she supplied. That photograph was of a woman lying on a bed with a sexy but tasteful pose. My client’s whole concern was that since she was not a younger woman, her body no longer looks the way it used to. I completed the painting as she wished and she was very pleased with it.
Like my painting, there is a canvas within you. But this canvas has been worked on by multiple artists over time. Everything you have seen, everything you have experienced up to this point has made you exactly who you are. However, if you want a different life and a different inner portrait the only Artist that should matter is YOU. Yes, I know it is very difficult when your own upbringing, your circumstances and your circle are completely different from the work of art that you really want to be, but right now, you can control that. Take the brush and the paint into your own hands and begin.
Let’s start with a clean canvas. Think about everything in your life that may not be conducive to who you want to be and begin erasing. Erase all your negative experiences by NOT thinking about them. Take a look at your current circle, the people you associate with and start trimming your list. If the people on your list are not helpful to who you want to be, then they don't deserve to be there. It's nothing against them and I know it sounds harsh but start distancing yourself away from them. You can do this without hurting anyone, just become involved and busy with your new creation that less and less time is spent with them. The people who remain on your list should have some of the qualities of the person you are trying to design.
Spend some time to forget. Forget who you currently think you are. You have been holding on to an image and an idea of who you think you are and you need to let go. Right now you are nobody and as nobody you can become anyone you want to be.
Remember and think on all the positive experiences you have had. Remember how those made you feel? Think about the feeling. You may have forgotten them because you have given more thought to all the negatives. If you are struggling to find your positive memories, then create some new ones. Invest some time in new positive experiences to start filling your canvas. Do something different from what you would normally do, something that the person you want to be would do. Make a journal and make a daily or weekly log of something you did that was different.
Meet new people. You were friends with the people you had in your circle before because you were comfortable with them. Now let’s get uncomfortable. Chances are, if you have begun creating new experiences and finding new things to do that was outside of the norm for you, you have been meeting new people already. You and these new people now have this new thing in common. People are very powerful and can impact and change your life. When you were a kid in school, remember the different peer groups that existed? Notice how these kids changed with the types of peers that they had? These peer groups tend to have a greater impact on who these kids turn out to be even more that their own parents. Or have you ever met a friend and notice how over the years your life seemed to change because of them? Now do you see how important your circle is?
Now your painting is almost complete! You have designed your background with new experiences, and your foreground with new relationships. Let’s bring this baby to life with some new habits. As you meet new people with qualities that you desire, observe them keenly (and not in a creepy way). Practice these habits. Make sure you also make a note of these in your journal along with your progress. Keep doing all of this; keep painting your new painting until you're satisfied and even then, don't stop. You are an ongoing masterpiece after all.