Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? Neither have i, but i have meditated by myself in the clear blue sky. Before i was recently admitted to the "Behavioral Center of Michigan", I often looked up at the sky above and had taken it for granted.
Being admitted to the behavioral center actually taught me a lot over Christmas, it gave me some alone time, how to meditate, gain some weight back, and even appreciate the small things i had taken for granted before. For an example all of the days i might've wasted chilling, smoking with unfavorable individuals, not eating right, and not focusing. Once i was released i vowed to never be in a place like this ever again. Not because i was treated like an deranged individual but more importantly because i had to spend Christmas eve and Christmas day in the facility. The first holiday i had ever spent without my family or seeing any of my loved ones.I originally went there because of what seemed to be and anxiety attack but actually was just my body reacting to a sort of histamine on my skin which then led to an anxiety attack. I had not slept in an entire day before i was admitted from itching so much so that made things worst.
I have a history of anxiety dating back to like 7th grade where i also was bullied from time to time. It was a strange time in my life growing up with anxiety,socially awkward, but being impressionable at the same time. I say this because i am believed to be a fairly nice looking guy.
But that doesn't mean i am not human, have emotions and have thoughts that taunted me for the rest of my life. Being in that facility gave me time to do some self-assessment. Learning how to meditate was one of the major parts of my self-assessment.So when i learned how to meditate it was so much of a relief it was like i had so much weight on my shoulders that was momentarily dropped off. Meditation gives me time to clear my head, not worry about things, ya know sort of get me in "THE ZONE".
Not "auto zone" people..lol Just a little comic relief from a serious topic.
But During the session of meditation we were taught to close our eyes, and think of a bright clear blue sky. Think of that clear blue sky as your mind and let the wind blow as it pleases but never let it get to cloudy. At this very moment(as i was inhaling through my nose and out through my mouth) i felt serenity. I felt all of the love that i should've been giving myself, all the power i could harness, all of my troubles going away. The meditation teacher continued her soft spoken words as i drifted between each breathe, and each thought i would have been having or pondering upon went in and out without me being able to grasp them. The session lasted for maybe 10 minutes and i felt as though i was the only one in the room, her voice faded and i was feeling that i was reaching my higher-self.
Around maybe the 6 minutes mark of the session i began to feel as if i were floating, as if i was light as a feather in the clear blue sky without a doubt or cloud in sight. I felt a sense of well-being as if i knew where i was headed in life and i was okay with it because it was going to be a wondrous adventure. I seen a light, not literally but it was as if a light was on me in the center of my forehead and blocking all of the negative energy that tried to surpass it and rush its way into my mind. Everything stopped and the session was now over. I looked to my left and i looked to the meditation teacher and i was back. Back to reality,but i loved the feeling. I loved the feeling of being one with your mind not taking in any toxins for a week, finding my inner-self and loving myself for who i truly am.
Every since that day i have been slowly but surely practicing to love, and let go.Practicing to meditate, learn about my chakras and learn how to clear my head. Let go of all of the toxic thoughts,people, and vices that will hinder me on my journey in life and live. Live to my fullest potential, live with a purpose, live with integrity and love in my heart. I will continue to meditate and reach that inner peace because their are so many things out here that will hinder you, you must have something or someone that's helping you.
I want to thank @Kalemandra for the challenge that i accepted for #fridayskyblue and also thank you guys for reading this.
If you had a moment of crisis and it turned out to make you a better person comment below, upvote this post, oh..and one last thing LOVE YOURSELF, KNOW YOUR WORTH, AND BE HAPPY.
Have a wonderful day Steemians.