About the sparks which light the fire inside my young soul.

Perhaps your thoughts are beyond her ability/capability to process. If she listens without suggestion, it could be because she realizes you should talk to the people who can help light the spark.

Perhaps the spark will take you far away from her; and, she's not able to accept that just yet.

What you perceive isn't always what is...in fact, rarely is perception accurate. EVERYTHING is an illusion on some level.

Only God is real; and for those who don't believe that, nothing more to add.

And, on behalf of all the people I've listened to, who feel kicked to the curb because their adult children no longer want them around, know that there are two sides to every coin.

Btw, sounds like what's missing has nothing directly to do with your mom right now; but the absence of a loving companion in your life. At this point, I'm sure your mother's distance will become moot.

Peace.