Human beings basically do not ever do anything which isn’t clearly outlined in their perceived best or uptmost interest, except out of habit or probably a moment of irrationality. When it comes down to emotions -- you might wonder, Why do we hold on so strong to emotional baggage? What’s really in it for us? Why would any person purposefully and well calculatedly decide to hold onto some painful memories of the past which has the potential to ruin their future?
Well, It isn’t purposeful -- rather it's painful.
If you have ever seen a person in some sort of physical pain, irrespective of if it’s a sprained ankle, headache, stomach pain etc.. they would always lay hold or grab the area which hurts -- Always. But… Why? Laying hold to a hurt ankle does not in any way aid to heal it. We could say that the reason we lay hold to what hurts is because pain gets our full and undivided attention. It’s pretty irrational to lay hold to a ankle which is injured but then the pain forces us to do so. Same way It’s pretty irrational to droll over bad memories, but then the pain allows us do so. You grab your ankle immediately or some seconds after it’s injured , not a year later when it probably has become very healthy. Physical pain thus fades away as time helps us to heal and contributes to our changes in behavior. Well, thats exactly how it is supposed to work, but then, if you decide to stomp on your foot every single day after you might have sprained your ankle, then it would still hurt for a year or more and it's really has no difference as compared to emotional pain.
It's a popular saying tha time heals every wound -- but then, that’s not quite accurate. Rather, Time would heal the wounds which you allow to heal.
What then could we equal emotional stomping on an injured? What exactly is it that restrains us from healing emotionally? One might reason that the best way is for us to ignore it for it to go away on it's own, but then, that really won’t work. Because if you just ignore an injured foot or ankle and continue to walk on it that way like nothing happened, it will take much more time to heal. The lesson here is that we must consciously, intentionally and purposefully treat our emotional baggage to heal ourselves.