Rather call attention to people´s mistakes indirectly!
It´s true, whatever you say before "BUT" doesn´t count anymore for the person you are talking to. The only thing that gets their attention are the words coming after it...
In case you try to listen to your surrounding and yourself the next days you´ll hear those "It was great BUT..." sentences all over the place. Most of us are using them despite hating them ourselves, whenever we are the recipient of it, right?
I mean whenever someone tells you how great you´ve done your job but that you have to focus more on a certain aspect next time you will probably just remember the last part and feel bad about it, while hating the one who told you.
Maybe an even better example is this famous break-up line "You are great, BUT...".
Most likely you´ve never heard anyone tell you anything that came before this aweful "BUT"...
So how can you improve the way you criticize people?
It´s actually quite easy to improve your criticism and on top of it not to get hated for it anymore. Efficient and thoughtful criticism can even improve the relationship to the other person and lead to ways better results in the end!
It´s already indicated above and it´s really a simple story.
Just replace the word "BUT" with "AND"!
You might ask yourself whether that´s really all you´ve got to do in order to not get hated anymore for your criticism, to finally achieve better results and to even improve your relationship with people. The answer is Yes, Yes it is!
Just have a look on your own and see for yourself, how much this small word will change and how differently the exact same sentence sounds after it:
Before:
I really liked the taste of your Lasagne,
but I think adding some more herbs would make it even better!
After:
I really liked the taste of your Lasagne
and I think adding some more herbs would make it even better!
I don´t think I have to add that much more to it as you most probably can feel the negativity of the word "BUT" already just by reading those two sentences right after each other. Therefore, to sum it up, use the word "AND" instead of "BUT" as it will smoothen your criticism and call attention to people´s mistakes indirectly.
Just try it and you´ll be amazed by the results. Promise!
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(A Proud German Ambassador from & for #Teamaustralia!)