If you are fortunate enough to have no grudges or resentment towards anyone in this world then you are truly blessed.
I say that because it can be very difficult to forgive someone who has hurt you deeply.
Forgiveness is a process. You don’t necessarily forgive someone in an instant. It takes time. And you may not even end up forgiving them 100%.
I think the first step is wanting to forgive. A second step that helps is knowing your “why”. Why are you forgiving this person? Reasons can be varied of course: just to be civil and get along; to be the bigger person; because your wife told you to etc. etc.
The last reason- forgiving for the sake of someone else- is not as powerful as forgiving for the sake of a higher power. For example, when you forgive someone for the sake of God, seeking only God’s pleasure, something happens inside you. There is no real chance of arrogance as may be associated with forgiving to be the bigger person. Also, when you try to forgive just to be civil and get along, there’s a chance that animosity still resides somewhere deep down. Forgiving because somebody told you to takes away some of your decision making and makes the deed less voluntary and may even lead to mild resentment towards the person forcing you to forgive!
Forgiving for God’s sake, seeking only God's pleasure is a powerful way of removing arrogance, animosity and resentment. It is also humbling. You cannot feel arrogant when you do something for God because whatever you do, you can never repay God for what He has given you. You cannot feel animosity or resentment when you do something for God because their is an element of choice in your decision- you have chosen to forgive this person for God’s sake. This is empowering and humbling at the same time.
So try it some time. If there is absolutely anyone in your life who has hurt you or disappointed you, forgive them. Not for them, not for yourself, but for a higher power. It will not go unnoticed and you will prosper emotionally.
Who have you forgiven and how did it feel? Or who do you want to try to forgive?
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