This is based on a real experience I had in 2 0 1 5.
My mind is an odd place and often dreams take the shape of reality.
It’s either too late, or too early, whatever you prefer to call this hour. I’m tossing and turning, trying to find my spot. The pillow is too warm, or too hard and oh God, how I wish I've invested in a good pillow by now.
The tv is still on and a poorly made sitcom is playing in the background. I don't mind the Tv light or the sound, it lulls me to sleep.
As I close my eyes, my mind slowly wanders away, like a cat with no home. Thoughts, ideas, are purged into the subconscious of my mind. Shiny bright stars, images that disappear so fast that I am unable to grasp, everything spirals into each other, one sheep, two sheep, thirty-nine sheep, crackling sounds.
What was that sound? Is my TV still on?
I open my eyes slowly as if they were thickly coated with mascara. I am now aware of my surroundings and I feel wide awake. Everything is styled in a darker hue but my room is still my room.
Although...
There is an eerie feeling. The TV is on, making the same crackling noise that woke me up. I am awake but I don't feel anything moving. Is as if time stood still.
Am I still breathing? Can I still move my hands? Why does it feel like a dream when I am completely aware of everything?
I can remember exactly how I ended up in my bed, I can see everything around me, I know that tomorrow I have to be wide awake at 8 am to catch a bus. I wonder what time it is?
As I'm asking myself these questions, my senses are tingling and I am now fully aware that I am not alone in this room and that I am being watched.
" I bet it's my mom, I said to myself. She came to tell me for the hundred time to use the sleep timer on the damn tv. "
As I turn around, I see him.
He stands still in the doorway of my, now cracked open, bedroom door and he looks at me.
Tall, slim figure, young, blue jeans, red t-shirt, short hair covered by a baseball cap. I can barely see his face, but I can see him and not through him, if it makes any sense. He is just as real as me.
What is this fuckery?
There is a man in the doorway, Ema, repeat that to yourself, there is a complete stranger in the doorstep of your room.
Why aren't I terrified? I should be spooked, I should be running, screaming for my parents, how did he end up here, is he going to hurt me?
He doesn't look suspicious and we just stare at each other, for what felt minutes, but it probably was just a few seconds. Time wasn't there, it was as if it disappeared or stopped, and here I am in my room, with a complete stranger staring at me. There is no sound and not a single breeze in this room.
He tilts his head, smiles and without saying a word, I know I have to follow him. And I do, even though it doesn't feel safe, even though I am aware that this is insane. I am apprehensive but at this moment, it doesn't even matter.
I move and I am now being shifted in a different, but familiar place. He brought me to my grandma's house. The air feels different and hues of blue are painting the whole scenery. I am now absolutely sure I am dreaming and I am awake in my dream.
He is sitting on the old staircase and he is now smiling wide open. We both keep a distance from each other.
He is so young, I bet he is my age!
He tells me without words that he is Jonah and that he is happy to meet me. He then proceeds to tell me about the blue hues that surround us, the sky, number 7 and repeats that he is happy we finally met. He can't stay long, but that's okay because at this point I want to wake up.
Fine details don’t exist in this dream, everything seems sketchy and I am starting to hear that awful crackling sound again.
I am now fully awake.
The first thing I noticed in the dim light as it's almost sunrise. I sit up.The bedroom door is closed and I can now move without feeling the weight of the world on me. I pinch myself and it hurts, my heart is beating loudly and I can feel myself breathing. I am back to reality and it's a relief.
Background story
After my grandma passed away in 2014, I got the habit of lightening random candles in the cemetery. At some point, back in 2015, I let my intuition guide me to a corner of the cemetery. There I saw the marble tomb of a family. The tomb was well take cared of and had a flag wrapped around the cross, with the lyrics from one of my favorite bands, Dream Theater.
If I die tomorrow
I'd be all right
Because I believe
That after we're gone
The spirit carries on
On the tomb, you can see his picture.
The dreamed happened in 2015 and even though I was accustomed to the face on the tomb, I didn't recognize the figure that was in my room, mostly because he kept his distance and the baseball cap was on his head, covering most of his face.
Jonah ( Ionut in my language ) died in 2002 and this is all I knew about him.
Since then, whenever I visit the cemetery, I light a candle at his tombstone and say a little prayer and a hello. I ask him to guide me if he can and that I hope he has a peaceful rest. My parents know about this and at first, they were weirded out, but they saw I kept my promise and always visited him.
A few months ago, I found out more about him. I was visiting the cemetery with my dad and he knew the gravedigger. He asked him about Jonah, and funny thing, he was the gravedigger back then, and he is the one who buried him. I found out that Jonah drowned while he was attending college ( could explain the blue hues from the dream ) and that his parents are well-respected doctors and that they always come to the cemetery.