I went through a similar phase a few years ago, dropped all my religious rituals because I felt handicapped & subconsciously dependent on them.

It was hell at first but slowly I started recognizing myself as a human (without a need of religious institution)

Frankly, the religious discipline goes so deep into me that I couldn't get to function properly without doing them, but now I'm in a position where I can be happy without it but can use that as tool whenever I need to.

Thanks for this post, it really connected to me.