Hi Steemians! I am writing up this long post in hopes to clear up my mind so that I can have some sort of peaceful sleep. I’ve been tossing and turning for some time now and my mind is not at ease.
Here I am, laying in bed as I throw glances at my other half who is fast asleep. I can’t help but think back on my own life at this time of night with what I have and have not achieved. I was reminded of this “life plan” I had when I was in high school. What is this life plan, you ask?
When I was in high school, probably around 13 or 14 years old, I drew up a plan on how I’d like to live life. I told myself that I should graduate from high school by 17 years old, get accepted into a university and graduate with a degree by 21 or 22. I’ll find my first real job right after graduation, buy a car and possibly a boyfriend or two (hahaha) and travel to Paris when I’m 25. When I’m 27 or 28 I’ll get engaged, buy a house and be married before turning 30. My plans ended at the age of 30 because I didn’t know what else should happen after that.
I can surely tell you that I laughed at myself many times for having such a timeline and things definitely didn’t really go exactly how the above wished. Although things didn’t happen at the specific age I hoped for, I still managed to tick off many of those things... minus the trip to Paris because Japan has this magnet on me 😉.
I guess these thoughts do run on my mind a lot as we are moving to our new house really soon. We are super excited and happy with this great achievement of getting our foot into the property market at last. The idea to purchase our first home however did not happen lightly and it has taken a toll on me mentally. I do have moments where I really want to start biting my nails out of nervousness of what life will be like once we move into our new home.
The biggest stress so far has been to talk to our lawyer for legal advice. I understand it’s the lawyers job to let the client know every single possibilities out there but our lawyer was a party pooper in my point of view. There has been nothing but negativity and constant advice that we should be prepared to back out of the sale contract. I couldn’t grasp the reason as to why I should be prepared as our documents and finances were very straight forward. It got to a point where I actually couldn’t talk to him on the phone any longer and had to have hubby deal with it. I was on the verge of breaking down in tears if I had to hear more negativity from that guy. I think he caught on later as he apologised for having to be so negative all the time and that was a part of his job... I forgive you!
I guess the other thing that runs on my mind constantly is the different surroundings at the new place. We are currently renting an apartment in the city so it’s really, really convenient to get to work, go out for meals and basically everything possible. Our new home is purchased in a suburb outside the city where convenience isn’t at the front door. We bought the place in hopes to build a family and to live around people who are also family oriented. This is where adulting really plays it’s role. Taking on the bigger responsibilities and other priorities matter more now than convenience and fun itself.
I look back at how we were before marriage quite often to compare it to how we are now. I found that we used to go out a lot with different people or each other, spent a great deal of money on food, shopping and travel and we would go home way past midnight on many occasions too. Shopping for discounts wasn’t really a thing as well. After marriage we’ve slowly cut down on eating out and enjoy home cooked meals, we enjoy and much prefer each other’s company over noisy outings with friends, we are keeping eyes open on car sales with thoughts of buying a family car and our Pinterest contains saved pins of homeware and furniture instead of fashion and Other trends. Oh yes, hubby uses Pinterest too now hahaha. Not to forget mentioning that we are constantly looking at catalogues for weekly specials at the supermarket and also looking up recipes for our next home cooked meal! 👩🍳👨🍳
Within a year, we have matured and our mindsets have changed. If you ask how we feel right now about everything, there’s no better way to put it than the word “content” 😌. Shamelessly revealing it, we are entering our 30’s. I am looking forward to seeing how the next few pages in life will write itself out. The same as back then, I still don’t have a plan for what life after 30’s should be like. Maybe throw in the idea of a kid and a pet for starters? I’m not sure. He’s also not sure. Let us have things fall into place on its own and time will tell. In the future when we enter our 40’s I’ll look back on this post and hopefully will be able to tell stories of our 30’s and how we dealt with things which I currently worry about.
For now, goodnight and I hope you have a lovely week! 👋