It is a choice, to be a victim.
Bad things happen to all, and many have victimhood forced upon them, often when children, or outnumbered, or outgunned. When lured with honeyed words and promises of friendship or victory. And then the trap is sprung, and you are indeed cornered, and victimized.
What you choose to do then, determines your fate. Not all choices are equal, and nothing is certain, but you still have to choose. Even 'not-choosing' is ofcourse a choice.. a choice to comply and let others decide your fate. And you will be shamed for letting them do it, by people who weren't there.
Many times in life, I found myself outnumbered, or manuvoered into traps. And sad to say, I usually just complied. I was raised to comply under all circumstances, no matter how horrid, and yes... shamed for doing so. I don't think the people in my life could have concieved how destructive such a thing is for a little person, because A Choice, repeated, becomes a Habit, becomes a Reflex.
So in time, I just reflexively complied, and kept silent, to avoid being shamed. It resulted in madness and torment, which still haunts me. It'll be here as long as I am.
But I am not a victim.
I have been victimized, to be sure. Tricked, hoodwinked, mislead, intimidated... cajoled, encouraged, enlivened, rewarded... Anything to keep me on the plantation, working for the abusers. The endless non-physical means of violence in our culture is, well.. Endless.
But being a victim is still a choice.
Our culture does not allow for self-defense, in most cases. The bullies will have the full support of the power-structure, because it allows the power-structure to continue. Bullies are part and parcel of human society. And while I was a captive in the school system, they had rule. While I was a captive of the workplace, they had rule. While I was a captive of co-habitation, they had rule.
I am not a captive anymore.
I am no longer there, in those places. I am free, and in relatively good health. I am still fairly young, and hopeful for the future. I will admit to being scared as to what that future may hold, for the world is getting darker every day.
