Have you ever wondered why are some topics considered taboos and have you noticed that different people have different things that they consider a taboo? In this article, I will try to go into the depth of this social construct and try to deconstruct it until I get to its very roots. Since I will be mentioning and talking about some things that you might find in the taboo category, like menstruation, sex, masturbation and various others, I did think about a #nsfw tag, but then again since there won't be any actual pictures of those (disappointed a little?) and this will be more of a psychological post, I think you are safe. Ready to talk about some taboo things? Here we go... :)

According to almost every dictionary available to man, a taboo topic of conversations is that one which is considered improper or unacceptable, forbidden even. There are things that are considered a taboo in one country or religion and not in the other. A taboo can be a behaviour or a conversation, I will stick to the conversational taboos here and how we avoid talking about some things. To be perfectly clear, I am not judging those people that have taboos nor is this post a way to discredit your beliefs. You should always be happy and satisfied and if talking about some things gets in your way of that, fine, but let's see why that is. Why are you, or anybody else, uncomfortable about masturbation, your urination, mental health or your religious practice?

There are those topics, that I've mentioned already, that are almost generally referred to as taboos but you can have taboos of your own. I have heard, and know, of some people who approach their eating habits, music preferences and even philosophy as things that they do not talk about with anybody. They will not say those subjects are taboos, but private. What is private and why do we have the need to keep some things private? Not every need for privacy is taboo, but there are two reasons for privacy and I personally think that one of those approaches is good and the other is bad.

There is a normal need to keep some things private as a way to keep them special and unique to only one person or a group of people. We have a tendency to assert bigger value to relationships that are different than others regarding the sharing of our thoughts and emotions. There are feelings and opinions that we will discuss only with a partner or a friend and establish a personal bond with that person. Whatever those things are for you, they are perfectly fine as long as your need to keep them private is rooted in your need for a unique bond. Something that only two of you will share and in that way make it your own. On the other hand, people keep some things private out of fear. There is a general belief that we will be ridiculed or rejected by the society. There is a fear of what others will think of us.

Do you masturbate regularly? Are you comfortable enough to answer me in the comments? If you are uncomfortable with this subject is it because it is none of my business or because you think I will judge you if I do not approve of your answer? Is my opinion that important anyway? Is anybody's opinion that important to you that you will stop yourself from discussing certain topics and diminish your chances of learning new things and hearing about different opinions and experiences?

After a lot of thinking, doing research and talking with a lot of people, I have come to the conclusion that taboo subjects are rooted in our insecurities. What will they think of me? is a question that often pops into our mind before we share our opinions on taboo topics. Will people think that I am a pervert if I masturbate every day? Will they look at me with disgust if I, as a woman, confess that I enjoy sex? How many of them will never talk to me if I say that I am bisexual and how many of them will look away when they see me, after knowing that I used to have a mental illness? What if I, as a man, enjoy wearing female dresses? Will they laugh at me? Those are questions that some people ask themselves on a daily basis, those and much more.

I am not implying that you are not normal if you keep some things to yourself or that you must talk about everything with everyone but I do hope that you have at least one person in your life with whom you can share everything. It can be your partner or a close friend. Talking about things will allow you to get a new perspective and open your horizons a bit. Your moral code will not be affected if you open yourself to others. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

I have always believed that diversity is a majestic thing. We are all different and unique with our own lives and opinions. We are all special. I do not believe in one general truth or the one correct way of living. What is good for me doesn't have to be good for you. It goes for our eating habits, sexual preferences, religious practices, life philosophies and even taboos. I value my opinion but I respect yours too. It was always strange for me to hear others preaching that this or that is the only way. That is why I try to be considerate of other peoples opinions and beliefs. Even though I myself am an open person and do not have taboo topics, I can not imagine myself imposing that lifestyle on others. Why would I? This is the reason why I listen more than I talk.

Oh Sarah, you get me :) I did say that I listen more than I talk and there is a good reason for that. You can learn a lot about people if you stay quiet and let them talk. The less you talk, the more you will get to know about them. When I do talk, I talk about everything and have no taboos, but I rarely do that without an invitation. I will answer every question and I am happy to talk about things that make me happy but I will never impose myself on others if they don't ask for it. The best way to get to know me is to directly ask me the thing that you are interested in. If you do not do that, I will probably be quiet and listen to you talk about yourself, and I will enjoy it. Maybe sprinkling some happy fairy dust on you will make you happier and more open and maybe it will even have an impact on me and get me to talk about something without being asked, let's find out...

There are things that are strange for me to consider a taboo. Menstruation and sex are one of them. I could never understand people who are ashamed to buy tampons or condoms in a store. Why? Do you know that you wouldn't be alive if there was no menstruation? It is a normal process in a female body, beautiful even. Why are some people uncomfortable with that? Not only men, there are women who don't talk about it too and not because they think it is something private but because it is something we should not talk about. Why shouldn't we? And why shouldn't we talk about sex? Why are we so ashamed of our sexuality? I personally think that my need for orgasms has the same value and importance as do my needs for food, water and sleep. Those are major things that a healthy human being should have on a regular basis in order to feel happy, healthy and satisfied with his or hers life. Why are we then happy to exchange are food recipes and culinary abilities but are shy regarding our sexual experiences? I have yet to find the answer to that question. It is one of those funny and curious things about humans that amazes me.

Do you have taboos? Are you ashamed of talking about some things and do you consider yourself an open or a closed person? Let me know in the comments. Keep your smile on and be satisfied with yourself and your life. You are special and unique. You are loved.