If there is a place I would like to avoid no matter what, that's for sure a dental office or a dental clinic. Accordingly, my love (if we can even speak about love) for dentists are at the lowest possible level as well.
I can't say that I genuinely hate them as I am somewhat handicapped when it comes to that hate feeling. In fact, I don't know how to hate. I can be angry like hell about something, but it would pass, and it's never that deep dark feeling, opposite from love and full of destruction. Even I sometimes use that "hate" word it's not the real hate.
However, last Thursday was that day I wanted to avoid no matter what but I couldn't. I had the appointment with my dentist, and it wouldn't be fair either sweet just to ignore it and not to show up. It was only another one in the long row of appointments in the last month or even two.
In other words, in that past period, I was visiting the dental clinic regularly every week at least once. What can I say, it seems like I manage to cultivate a lovely graveyard in my mouth. 😜
Usually, everything is more or less OK, until I come to the door and see that chair. You wouldn't believe how many jokes and stories I can pull out (who knows where from) just to drag the attention of my dentist and not to sit on that chair. Unfortunately, ever joke and story have its end despite my efforts to stretch and postpone it as much as it's possible.
But sooner or later I end up on that chair and then arrives the next nightmare. I see only that to the chair strangely attached movable arm or leg with that crazy device full of all sorts of borers. My dear Lord! 😱
The worst part is I'm very well aware how all those dentists for some to me unknown reason are crazy and deeply in love with that device and those borers. I don't know do they experience some ecstasy when they stick it in your mouth, but they are doing it so passionately.
Of course, they are not going to grab it the very moment you start drowning in that chair. There is a very profound procedure before that dramatic moment.
As first, they are going to lace up around your neck that special dentist bib. I always feel semi-suffocated with it. Then, they are going to turn on that lamp that looks to me more like some concentration camp's searchlight and point it directly to your face.
They don't find any problem with using it. And maybe it's only me. I don't know. Maybe other people see that lamp as a stage reflector, so they could finally somewhat experience that feeling of being on the Broadway's theater scene.
I'm obviously not that type, or maybe I should take into consideration to observe it from that angle although I don't think it would be a success.
Just about the time when you would start hoping there would be at least one more preparation stage, the dentist is going to ambush you. They would quickly stick into your mouth the pump in the form of a question mark upper part of the hanger (allegedly only for saliva collection) and a whole bunch of tampons (as well and supposedly for the same purpose).
In that lovely pose, with the wide-open mouth of some hungry lion most in-depth roaring, when you are not able to swallow anymore and breathe only through your nose, the main drama is just about to start.
I'm really getting suspicious every time more and more that those dentists must experience some ecstasy while doing that as I can't otherwise explain to myself that devil dance over my teeth of exchanged puttering, poking, picking, grinding, drilling, boring, scouring, rubbing, scrubbing, etc. inside my mouth.
And somewhere there is my culmination point when my relationship with my dentist is closest to hate.
But why I love my dentist despite all of above said?
At first, she is our friend and a genuinely warm, compassionate, and at the same time funny and very cheerful human being. As a dentist, she is gentle, precise and fast. I never set on that chair longer than half an hour. Besides, each her patient may always choose from special hypnosis to injection what would make the whole procedure entirely painless.
Above all, I admire her because of her honesty. She wouldn't have a second thought to admit that she is the greatest dentist hater (despite the fact of being the one), and the biggest chicken when she has to sit on the dentist chair.
Because all of that the relationship that I have with my dentist sometimes remind me of the song "The Thin Line Between Love And Hate," although I don't believe she would ever by any of her patients end up like the guy in that The Pretender's song.
P.S.
Just for precautionary reasons!
If you are anything like me when the dentists are in question, as first...
Don't forget to brush your teeth!
Better be safe than sorry! 😉
But even if you are brushing your teeth regularly, don't avoid dentists for years (as I did) to end up with some different kind of graveyard in your mouth. If nothing else, however you turn it around, it's cheaper to fix it sooner than later, and above all...
The people around you need your beautiful and unique smile!
Posted on Sunday, January 28, 2018
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