The question I want to ask you today is: where do you prefer to live – big city or small town?
This is something I’ve given some thought lately, and I’d be interested to listen to your opinions on this.
Here is the experience that made me actually wonder. A friend of ours - a very energetic woman, who for years was center of attention everywhere she appeared – always full of ideas, always running somewhere and doing something (you know this type of people). She had lived half of her life in Moscow and half in Paris, where she organized art exhibitions, went to every important reception, dressed at the best designers and knew everyone including the mayor.
So 15 years ago she sold her apartment in Paris and moved with her husband to a tiny village in Normandie, near Deauville (you know, where that romantic movie was filmed) - far away from city and any kind of urban civilization. They bought a gorgeous 19th century house, renovated it with their own hands,
and got a dog.
Now her daily routine consists of going to the market for fresh food in the morning, chatting with her neighbors on the only street that village has (as you can guess, this is a kind of place where everybody knows each other), picking up locally made cheeses at fromagerie d'Annabelle,
quiet family dinners and walking her dog along the beautiful old streets before she goes to bed.
Everyone who knew her said she could never live in such a secluded place, and that she would definitely move back. She never did. And she hates it when she has to go to Paris on business. She says, she can’t stand it anymore.
So when she called my friend and me to visit her last year, I was really concerned. We were planning to go for two weeks, and I just knew, it would be boring as can be. Especially for me – when I am traveling, I need to be moving, seeing new places and doing new things every day. I just can’t be in one place. Even more so, if this place is a nameless little town in the middle of nowhere.
So we decided to stay there for a few days and then rent a car and travel across France.
And we did rent a car. But we never left. After just a couple of days there something happened to both of us. We felt like we were at home. We actually enjoyed going to the market, tasting cheeses and having family dinners in the beautiful cozy living room filled with antiques,
and we also loved putting on three wool sweaters to walk with the dog before bed, because it was November and it was cold and windy.
And those were one of the best two weeks of my life.
Another example is my dad, who lived for 30 years in Moscow, and then moved to Lakewood, Colorado, to a nice house with lawn and can’t even think about living someplace else now. Every day when he comes home from work, this cute little bunny is waiting for him in the bushes
When I plan to visit him, I always think I would be bored, and every time without exception I get so comfortable living like this, that I end up changing my ticket to stay longer.
I am actually a big city girl – I spent my whole life in Moscow (except for when I studied in Barcelona and lived in US for a while). And probably like many of you, I never even considered living in a smaller town. Every time I passed them on my travels I thought “What do these people do?” “Aren’t they bored”?
But the thing is, they aren’t. They are actually a lot less bored than most people living in big cities, many of whom don’t know what to do with their lives. And here’s why.
It’s easy to get lost in a big city in every way. Big cities make us feel really small. Little towns work on the contrary – it’s like you are under a magnifying glass. When you live in a place like that, where everybody knows each other and no artificial chemicals are added to food or to people, it’s a lot more difficult to escape from yourself and a lot easier to figure yourself out. Because you don’t have all these massive decorations confusing you. You just have simple things. And you actually become more genuine, honest and even more creative. You see yourself and your life more clearly than you ever could, being a part of a big nameless crowd.
Many of us can’t imagine life without all benefits a big city has to offer. But my latest experiences made me realize that most of these things are only an illusion. It’s what we think, not what we actually feel. We don’t even use many of those benefits – we just think that we can’t live without them. And many (of course, not all) of us would be happier living differently. We are just scared to let go.
But if we did, we might realize, that a completely different way of life fits us best and actually makes us feel happy.
And is there anything more important that that?