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Have you ever felt like you weren’t pretty enough for the person you want? Or that the person you want is so desirable and so attractive that they have so many options and you wonder why they would choose you?
I recently asked my Facebook followers, “”What was that moment with a guy or girl where you realised you were deeply attracted to him or her?” and here’s what they said;
One lady said that “a mother was pushing her stroller across the street, and didn’t notice when her blanket fell off. Without hesitation, the guy I was in a date with, grabbed it, walked up to her and gave it back and I that point I realised how deeply I had fallen for him”.
Another lady said “The guy I was dating stayed over fir the first time in my house. The next morning, I went to make coffee for us and by the time I was back to the bedroom, he had already made the bed. That’s a very rare virtue for guys and that’s when I knew I was deeply in love with him”.
Yet another lady said, “me and the guy were taking a walk in a park one day and he spontaneously asked me, what are the two things you grateful for? It made me so attracted to the positive way he looked at life and I couldn’t help but fall head over heels in love with him.
Now, over to the guys.
One guy said, “’I mentioned a book that really meant a lot to me and a week later, I found out that she not only had bought a copy but had started reading it aswell”
Another guy said, “I was speaking in a phone to the woman I was seeing and her friends had just invited her out that night. She told me that she said NO to them because she wanted to stay back and finish a project that was important to her, it made me realise how hardworking and determined she was and I got attracted to her level of focus in life”.
Yet another guy said, “I was on a date watching a movie with the girl I was seeing. The movie was so touching and I was trying so hard not to cry, being a very emotional being. I look over to see if she would notice my countenance, but her eyes were glued to the screen and she was already crying. At that point I knew I had met someone as emotional as I was and the attraction just got stronger”.
Now, these were all beautiful moments relieved but I call these moments MICROATTRACTIONS. Microattraction is said to be the understated moments and behaviours that make us realise someone is the kind of person we might want to spend a life with. And I think, this is where the real game of attraction should be played. This is crucial to understand because we live in a world right now that over value all the wrong things, money, fame, popularity, how many followers you have on Instagram etc. All of these things are what we think are the barometers for how attractive someone is, but the truth is, when it really comes down to it, for mature and intelligent people, they are looking for a person of character, integrity and a person who exhibits the qualities that they want to experience in a relationship over a life time on a daily basis.
So we really do have to stop ruling ourselves out of the game simply because we think that someone gets a lot of attention or they have a lot of options, and start valuing properly, our growth as a person and our character because to be honest, with the best and mature people, that’s where the real game is being played.
In one of my favourite movies, Vanilla Sky. David Ames played by Tom Cruise, reflects on the small moments in his life that had giant consequences. He concludes by saying “The little things…there’s nothing bigger, is there?.
Now I would like each and every one of you reading this piece to do this for me. Write in the comment section a moment of micro attraction where you either felt drawn to another person because of something they did or they told you they were drawn to you because of something you did. Let’s make this a little interactive as we all have fun together.
