I will like to start with Steve Harvey words, been honest most times gives you the ability to understand the kind set of people that will add value to your goals in life.
I have come to understand few things about those values and currently am working on it, most times friends add value to you life positively or negatively, negativity attract negative, likewise positive.
What kinds of action do you take when you find yourself in this position.
here are few tips to help you with.
Decline plans. If they manage to contact you and try to make plans, you are going to need to say no. Here are some ways that you can politely decline an invitation:
“Thanks for thinking of me, but I can’t make it that day.”
“No, but thank you for inviting me.”
“Thanks, but I’m not a huge fan of that activity.”
Be honest. If your “friend” starts asking questions and pushing you to hang out, you should drum up some courage and tell the truth. If they approach you and want to talk, it probably means that the feeling to “drift apart” wasn’t really mutual. You will need to tell it to them straight and make a clear break in the relationship.
Examples of things you might say include:
“I think our friendship is growing apart, and maybe we should let it.”
“I just don’t feel that we are compatible as friends anymore.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to spend time together.”
Stop and reflect on the friendship. Before taking any drastic steps, just take a little time to reflect on the friendship. Getting rid of a friend can be a big decision and you don’t want to burn bridges unnecessarily. So take some time and think over both the pros and cons of this relationship.
Generate a pro/con list, listing good aspects and bad aspects of the friendship.
Be sure to focus on the present relationship, not the way it “used to be.”
Look for “toxic” signs. There are several signals that a relationship is bad for you. When you are reflecting on your friendship, keep an eye out for signs that the friendship is actually toxic. If you experience several of these signs, it is a good idea to create some distance.
You feel drained after spending time with them.
You don’t like the way you act in their company.
There is no balance. Either they ignore you, or they want way too much attention.
They make you feel bad or try to manipulate you.
You’ve lost respect for them.
Determine your boundaries. Before you head into a “break-up” conversation with your “friend” make sure you know what you want the exact outcome to be. Will you want to permanently cut ties and never speak to each other again? Do you just need space temporarily? Will you still be cool with them in groups, but you have no desire to hang out one-on-one? Make sure you know what sort of boundaries you will need to set, and be as specific as you can.
Think about mutual friends. It is also a good idea to think about and plan how you will handle the issue of mutual friends. If you want a total break and never want to see this person again, it means that any shared friends will need to choose between you. It also means you may not get invited to certain events (or they may not). If you are dealing with a toxic friendship, then it is definitely worth it. But it is worth thinking about and considering how you will deal with and/or explain the situation to shared friends.
Watch how well you grow with company you keep, either physically or emotionally, bible also said “show me your friends and i will tell you who you are”.