Dear readers,
one of the comments I often get from my male friends, when discussing sex, is "For you it's easy. You're a girl."
I am not denying that it is indeed easier for a girl to "get what she wants". The reason for this is that men are far easier turned on than women. Sometimes all it takes to wake the little soldier up is the sight of a bare ankle (slipping from underneath a girl's pants) or the strap of bra getting uncovered. With men, it's the visual that drives arousal. (Hence the success of sexy underwear ...) And once men start getting aroused, they will "look" for things to get even more turned on ("Oh, you can see her nipple pushing through her shirt").
Men are ready almost on the spot. When you're out with your boyfriend, on a sunny day and you cross a hot young girl, you can be certain he (secretly...) pictures her naked and his male parts are getting ready to impregnate her. I deliberately choose the latter word, because that's what drives him: the primal instinct to share his genetic material. Honestly, ladies, if you notice your man eyeing another girl and you see movement in his pants... you can't really blame him. But guys, we don't need to hear your thoughts, so, please, spare us the "damn, she's hot" comment. It makes us feel bad.
For girls, it's a different story. When a woman spots something arousing, instead of looking for more arousing features, she will look for signs of danger and her brain will try to talk her out of being aroused. This, for instance, explains why women will get more turned on by looking at a hot girl showering (safer) than by seeing the cute pool boy take of his shirt. (Yes, guys, girls turn us on...)
This, too, is a primal instinct. When we get turned on, our body prepares to receive semen and our mind goes into overdrive to protect us from harm (from the vulnerable position we put ourself in during sex, to the risk of getting pregnant and the potential to have to raise a child on our own). Yes, guys, the average girl worries a lot before and even during sex. So, when a girl gets turned on, instead of trying to increase her level of arousal, her mind will try to mute her sex drive.
So, when a girl does decide to go all the way, it means she has decided to act against her primal instincts. Which is quite a big deal. So, to counter the cliché that "it's easy for a girl to get laid", I would like to point out that while it is easy for us to get a male, it is a whole different struggle on the mental front. And the fight against our primal instinct is but one aspect. There are many others: complexes about our body, the looks and judgements we'll get, ...
Hear me: yes, we can get you, men, easily to do what we want, but it's far more difficult to get ouselves to do that...
Alright: goodnight people!
Lots of love,
L.