We must all die alone, which really means, that our pain is for us alone to endure.
A German writer whose name was Goethe had a lot of friends, at an intense moment, he spoke bitterly:
No one has ever properly understood me, I have never fully understood anyone; and no one understands anyone else.
This statement was a useful expression from a legend; a great man.
Well, it is not our fault: an intensity of distance and common inability to understand is not an indication that life has gone detrimental.
It is what we are meant to expect from the beginning is that no respected being would ever feel lonely unless he or she moves to a new area, vicinity or territory.
A high intensity of loneliness is an unrelenting part of being an intelligent human. It is an infused feature of a composite existence.
Several big reasons for loneliness
1. Lack of understanding
It takes a lot of effort (energy) to listen to another person and sympathize with them or their experience. We should not benefit others for failing to focus on who we are. We should accept the vitality with which they will want to keep their own life or experience as the centre of the conversation.
2. Different problems
Our pain is for us to endure alone. Some people might throw us words of encouragement but in life, we are on the ocean drowning in the ocean waves, even the nice ones are standing on the shore waving merrily or taking selfies.
3. Different behavior and experience
It will be rare to ever find someone of same behavior as us: we will long for outer congruency, but there will be permanent conflicting notes because we are from different families, appeared on earth different times, different experiences. Therefore, our thinking won't be the same. For instance, a group of people looking out at the night sky, some would perhaps remember a painful detail while some will remember a beautiful and intellectually stimulating experience.
4. Different mindset
If people think the same, having the same thoughts, if they are thoughtful and perceptive. There will simply be less people around. Loneliness is a tribute we have to pay to clear for a certain complicacy of mind.
5. Slightest idea of the potential for connection
We might never meet the people that understands us but they do exist. Maybe, they walked past us or they died in another vicinity three weeks ago or they won't be on earth until the 22nd century.
We all have to accept loneliness because once we accept it, we can get to know the talents within us: we can get more creative; you might find out you know how to sing, produce blogs, write poetry. Just like my previous post, I stated that some people get the desire to write through loneliness or boredom.
Loneliness makes us more capable of true intimacy, it gives us character; like we develop a point of view.
Loneliness helps us to know more about ourselves.
Enduring loneliness is almost invariably better than suffering the compromises of false community. It is a price to pay for holding on to an ambitious view of what companionship could be.
