- Beauty
There’s outer beauty, which contains the makings of classic physical attraction or chemistry, and there’s inner beauty, which refers to your traits, character, or soul. Basically, how you look or how you can make someone attracted to you. beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
- Proximity
Let’s get this boring and non-romantic pillar out of the way. It turns out that someone is more likely to be attracted to you if you and they see each other (if you never met). This is not deep. In fact, this is practically a tautology, like saying when I exited the building, I was outside.
Stated more precisely, the more often two people see each other (all things being equal), the more likely they will become attracted to each other. This is called the mere exposure effect.
- Similarity
Birds of a feather flock together. We are more attracted to others who are similar to us in appearance, beliefs, interests, and so on. Of course, if someone likes the same things as you, they obviously have good taste, right? Normal ego breeds such reasoning, as in imitation is the highest form of flattery.
- You Liked Them First
This factor is probably the most complicated. Someone is more likely to be attracted to you if they first learn that you are attracted to them. Among potential processes here is again ego. If you find them attractive, they may be flattered and think you have good taste. And then once they show interest in you, you may be flattered and think they have good taste. A cycle can ensue in which interpersonal attraction grows.
- Non-Sexual Arousal
Lastly, brains can be tricked into mistaking our non-sexual arousal for sexual arousal. In the classic scary-suspension-bridge study, men appeared to confuse their bridge-induced physiological arousal (such as elevated heart rate and respiration) for attraction to a woman who entered the bridge.
In summary
If you’re trying to make someone interested in you, here are some bottom lines. Make yourself look as good as you can.