A lot of people think that being in love and love are actually the same thing. That couldnt be any further from the truth.
The states of being in love and love can alternate between each other,they can replace each other or even exist at the same time.
At the beginning of a relationship, there is normally a passionate phase where we fantasize a lot and project our ideal picture of our dream partner (dream man or woman) on the person we’re in love with. When some time pass, we start to perceive the other person in their real form. If we don’t like how we see the other person in their real form or they don’t fit our ideal, for most of us, the conflict starts.
Then a lot of people start telling their friends they have been deceived in the person/cheated on them on their real character.
The expectation of a lot of people is that: „What doesn’t give me the permanently the high feeling of being in love, can’t be love.“
The truth is, being in love is only a short moment we feel in the course of being with someone. Being in love lasts for an estimated period of 3 months to 3 years. There are reasons for that because our body couldn’t handle the permanent hormone cocktail we’re in when we’re in love. Our body is in an exceptional state throughout this time.
That exceptional state is also the reason why we feel obsessed with the other person. We feel the need to spend a lot of the time with the other person and crave a lot of physical proximity.
At the end of the state of being in love, there are several risks, but also chances.
Some people cross the bridge and manage to stay together when the first glimpse of being in love has passed. When people actually stop being in love and they see the flaws and weaknesses of the other person, some people start to cultivate coldness and unkindness.
Being in love is much easier than actually loving someone.
Real love happens when we start to see the person as a whole with all their flaws, edges and weaknesses and accept them as they are. Then being in love changes to loving someone.
Loving someone is free from expectations we have when we are in love. That means even when I see the other person in their real form with all their flaws and edges, I don’t want to change them. I start to accept the other how he or she is.And vice versa. It’s the joy to be around someone that cares about me and my wellbeing, someone who cares about what I need and enjoys it to give it to me.
Being in a relationship doesn’t include only the decision to be in a relationship with someone, but also that we feel connected to someone in a special way. That also means that we decide over and over to be in a relationship with this person or to spend a big period of our life’s with this particular person.
Then our partner isn’t only a companion – but someone that supports us on our way.
WINKS.. LOL. (Just friends ..)
How do you understand Love? Comment below.., Upvote.. Resteem..