Cocked his head backwards allowing his obvious doubt glow his face. Although she had profess love to him not just with mare words but with tears dripping through her lips.
“Janet, I understand what you feel for me is real but..” his mouth froze letting the goosebumps on his thigh cloud his skin with great cold.
Eddie would always stutter anytime he needed to Express himself but unfortunately his friends marked that as a sign of lying.
As for Janet, she stood silent as a stone. Her light blue eyes with conjuring gestures could rob Eddie of his pride but this was far and had nothing to do with emotions because her whole life; growing as a kid, they had always been together to the extent which their parents and neighborhood endorsed them as soul mates.
“Jane! You should know am a flirt. You’ve been within the four walls of my miserable life watching my hustle especially after my mother died knowing my dad turned a drunk because he wasn’t cool with loneliness”
Janet frown at him, he nodded reluctantly as her jaw wore a tight frown which relented immediately Eddie clasped her hands on his with pleading look in his eyes.
“Our lives are the results of our choices” but Eddie didn’t know that. He thought his dad had become a drunk after the death of his mother but that was a lie.
He hated his father not knowing that his mother had died on the day she and her husband were on a trip to a wedding and the accident had occurred because Mr. Peter, Eddie’s dad had sniffed cocaine right on their matrimonial bed before hitting the road with his wife.
He’s a hedonist who just hates soberness. The only time you can find Mr. Peter sober- is immediately he wakes in the morning although that could be a lie because he mostly woke with hangover.
Smoking, drinking and popping were right his alley. Had it been he was born in June and considered a Gemini then we would have understood his inability to stick to a particular niche of drug or something because Mr. Peter’s addiction was just way extraordinary.
He had forsaken Eddie to the streets lavishing his wealth on teenage girls and young stunners like him.
A friend of Eddie who happens to have been present at where Mr. Peter was drinking once told Eddie that his dad would have been taking care of him if only he could be a stunner too.
“Eddie! Why are you playing hard to get even when we both know that you always want me to be with you during the best times of your life"
Janet wouldn’t have said that but at that moment; there was absolutely nothing else to say because she knows Eddie and how willed he can be.
Eddie chuckled faintly to himself and withdrew his hands from hers. His big cat like hazed eyes met hers again but this time they both blinked at each other with a drop of tear on Eddie’s lips.
He held her shoulders tightly almost causing her pains because of his lengthy fingernails. “Do you know how much it hurts in the chambers of my own soul? Can you grasp the pain I feel everyday I wake alone with no one to groom or direct me? Do…”
Eddie hadn’t even started his next statement of pain when Janet clasped her hands on his jaw and pressed her lips on his.
Though she knew he wasn’t in love with her but she just wanted a taste of him. Yes! They kissed for quite some seconds before Eddie retrieved his face from her cold hands immediately he felt his penis kicking.
Eddie cocked his face downwards studying her with intense curiosity in his eyes which caused her to fidget in uncertainty under the weight of his scrutiny.
“What if I make love with you today and still don’t date you as you want? Won’t you call me a cheat like every other guy out there?
Janet still refused to let go of his hands; instead she dragged her eyes back to his face, drowning in the crystal lucid depth of his big cat eyes. “I know forcing you into this relationship is weird and also belittles my pride but my whole life, you’ve been there all along and it’s just you I find peace and worthiness for my soul"
Although her words coined it way into his heart but his mind was already made up and he wasn’t going to take advantage of her emotions and lust.
Suddenly she left his hands walking towards the almond tree watching at them. Her hairs was midnight black and it plunged over her shoulders.
Eddie sometimes wondered why he couldn’t swallow the camel and date her mostly after tasting her saccharine sweet lips which was lilac soft.
To him, Janet is different and totally irreplaceable in his life. She has a cheerful character with elegant smile which made her pouting lips display her halo white teeths.
Her beauty wasn’t just enough but the way she spoke letting her soothing voice fill the air would always make him want to want her more but he couldn’t date her because he knew he would end up cheating on her.
Eddie is just nineteen; young and energetic with big dreams which hunts his dreams at night. He had decided not to get committed to any girl knowing it is of no use.
He knows one way to be different is to live differently and watching his peers jumping from one intimate relationship to another wasn’t just the way he wanted to live.
Every morning he wakes, the words of Woody Allen which he had posted on the wall just by the side of his bed would always hit him to focus as it reads “You can live to be hundred if only you’ll give up all things that makes you want to live till hundred”.
He had learnt a lesson from his father’s life and had coined a word from it saying “Before marriage, I must learn to be lonely and alone".