Recently, I have thought about my dreams and asked myself a lot of times. Should I pursue my dreams? If I give up everything to pursue my dreams, what will I risk? How many obstacle must I overcome when pursuing dreams?
As mentioned in some previous posts, I graduated from law university with an excellent degree. Now I am working as assistant in law firm to become a real lawyer. I think that is my dream. Being a lawyer. It must be great, right? But now, I have to consider about being a DA what my parents almost forced me to do. Honestly, DA is really good job, especially in Vietnam. I will write about how state agencis in Vietnam work and what a Vietnamese DA will do in next post (This is one of main reasons makes me dont want to be a DA). Being a DA is the best for me, at least in my parents' point of view. But, I just want to be a lawyer.
I tried to convince my parents how great a lawyer would be. But they dont believe I can survive if I keep being a lawyer assistant, or even a lawyer. You know, it will be a hardest time - the first 3 years of being lawyer. Because salary scale is too low. It is not enough to me survive in a city like Hanoi. And my parents have to keep providing me with money. That is why they dont want me do it anymore and force me to go back home and being a DA. Otherwise, they dont care anymore, I must survive by myself. Yeah. There are too many obstacles, but biggest obstacle is money. I cant be a lawyer if I dont have money to survive, to keep learning in Judicial Academy.
And you know what, if I dont have any money, I may lose my friends, even boyfriend because I will be leaning on them. Society will look upon me and think "You are only worth how much money you have". My parents, just sometimes, will talk about some one who is son or daughter of their friend, the same age with me and already reached success. And make me feel bad enough. Some one may ask if I am having a midlife crisis and then...what should I say. All of these concerns result from belief systems I was given by someone else: my parents, teachers, friends, neighbors,... etc. But the real question I have to ask myself is "What do I believe?" "Who I am if I dont follow my dreams?? "
I start to change the way I think by telling myself that my parents was wrong. I am capable of designing my own life without working a job I dont want. I am capable of discovering what makes me feel good, strong, happy, excited,... I realise what makes me happy is actually what I am good at. It is a matter of what I want. Being a lawyer to enjoy the feelling when finding out some mistakes of contracts, detecting the way to help clients avoid potential risks, ... enjoy the free life of lawyer or being a DA and stuck in some where with corruption??? What is better? I got it.
A dream without action will remain a dream. A dream that motivates an action has the opportunity to become a reality!!
I should say thank you with some one who always proud of me even though I am nothing, encourage me whenever I feel disappointed about myself.
"Thank you. You make me want to enjoy my life more and more. You are my strongest motivation."